Augusta GA Divorce Lawyer - Japan's divorce rate threatens the family unit
Japan (MNN) ― One in every four marriages in Japan now ends in divorce. The issue has been a source of concern for a society in which families are a core strength. The Japanese grow up following their society's emphasis on social interdependence---the concept of being members of the whole as opposed to the individual.
Family responsibilities take precedence over individual desires, and familial relations provide the model for social integration at all levels. Furthermore, the family plays an important role in determining individual life chances. That's why the rising divorce rates have shaken the society to its core. The family unit foundation is falling apart for both this generation and the next, tearing at the fabric of their society.
There are ways this is being addressed. Tim Clark with Asian Access is working with a pilot program called "The Marriage Course" by Alpha. However, some of the facilitators were concerned about how it would be received by the Japanese.
It's a delicate issue because the Japanese are known for their sensitivity, propriety and privacy regarding marriage and families.
That was soon overcome. Clark acknowledges that "many start the course with a little bit of skepticism and hesitancy, not wanting to go deep into discussion. But both Christians and non-Christians are finding it to be a great way to ease into discussing important matters that are crucial to the health of their marriages."
The Alpha Course provides a comfortable environment to people from all walks of life to discuss and learn about foundational issues of the Christian faith. The course is designed to serve those seeking to study the essential basics--new believers as well as seekers (those who have not yet come to a place of fully believing).
From the course came a seven-week study for marriages. Participating couples are equipped with biblical tools for communication, conflict resolution and growth.
Clark says interest is rapidly growing from the three marriage courses running now, and A2 is beginning the Japanese translation of the course materials. "There are very few resources in Japan for strengthening marriages and families. Many churches are recognizing this need, both for church members as well as for their friends and others who aren't a part of the church."
Alexandra Gonzalez-Waddington is an Augusta GA divorce lawyer & Georgia Military Divorce Lawyer Augusta Georgia domestic mediator. She is an Augusta military divorce lawyer, GA child custody attorney , and Augusta Georgia child support attorney. She offers mediation for divorce, child custody, and child support.
Augusta GA Divorce Lawyer - Patricia Arquette dismisses divorce case
Augusta GA Divorce Lawyer - Patricia Arquette dismisses divorce case
LOS ANGELES (AP) — Patricia Arquette and Thomas Jane will remain married.
Court records show the "Medium" star requested and was granted a dismissal of the couple's divorce case, which she filed in January.
The one-page dismissal didn't indicate a reason for the 41-year-old actress seeking a dismissal. Records show her request was filed on Tuesday and approved on Thursday.
The couple was married in May 2006 and have a daughter, Harlow Olivia Calliope Jane.
Arquette won an Emmy Award in 2005 for her portrayal of a paranormal expert on "Medium." The 40-year-old Jane appeared in the 2007 film "The Mist" and 2004's "The Punisher," and he stars in the new HBO series "Hung."
Alexandra Gonzalez-Waddington is an Augusta GA divorce lawyer & Georgia Military Divorce Lawyer Augusta Georgia domestic mediator. She is an Augusta military divorce lawyer, GA child custody attorney , and Augusta Georgia child support attorney. She offers mediation for divorce, child custody, and child support.
LOS ANGELES (AP) — Patricia Arquette and Thomas Jane will remain married.
Court records show the "Medium" star requested and was granted a dismissal of the couple's divorce case, which she filed in January.
The one-page dismissal didn't indicate a reason for the 41-year-old actress seeking a dismissal. Records show her request was filed on Tuesday and approved on Thursday.
The couple was married in May 2006 and have a daughter, Harlow Olivia Calliope Jane.
Arquette won an Emmy Award in 2005 for her portrayal of a paranormal expert on "Medium." The 40-year-old Jane appeared in the 2007 film "The Mist" and 2004's "The Punisher," and he stars in the new HBO series "Hung."
Alexandra Gonzalez-Waddington is an Augusta GA divorce lawyer & Georgia Military Divorce Lawyer Augusta Georgia domestic mediator. She is an Augusta military divorce lawyer, GA child custody attorney , and Augusta Georgia child support attorney. She offers mediation for divorce, child custody, and child support.
Augusta GA Military Divorce Attorney - Guard families struggle with deployments
Augusta GA Military Divorce Attorney - Guard families struggle with deployments
Repeated military missions causing strife in civilian life
By Chris Kenning
When Thomas Leonard joined the Kentucky National Guard in the 1980s, he considered it a part-time job to help pay the bills through college — a commitment of one weekend a month, two weeks a year. Being sent to war barely crossed his mind.
But since 2003, the 46-year-old Louisville medical worker has been deployed overseas twice — once to Iraq, once to Afghanistan — weathering mortar and small-arms attack, nearly two years of absences and jarring returns to civilian life.
"My daughter and sons grew so fast that I remembered them as young children, yet when I came home they were teenagers," he said.
Similar stories are being told across Kentucky, Indiana and the nation, as the fight against terrorism and two wars overseas have radically redefined what it means to be a citizen solider. The Guard is being called up in numbers not seen since World War II, at one point in 2005 making up half the Army's combat force in Iraq.
In Kentucky, 4,170 of the state's 7,208 Army National Guard members were deployed to Afghanistan, Iraq or Guantanamo Bay for up to a year between Sept. 11, 2001, and October 2008. Another 1,005 have been on two deployments — 168 have found themselves on three and even four deployments.
The state's National Air Guard has made 3,558 total deployments since 2001.
The Indiana Guard, meanwhile, has deployed 9,800 Army soldiers and 3,000 Air National Guard members in the War on Terror, according to a June report sent to Gov. Mitch Daniels.
"This is a totally different Guard than it used to be," said David Altom, a spokesman for the Kentucky Guard. "But it's a product of its time."
Col. Phil Miller, the Kentucky Guard's chief of staff, said the deployments and their stresses haven't hampered recruiting, which has exceeded goals for five straight years. Nor has it restricted its ability to respond to state crises, such as the ice storm that hit Kentucky in January, which mobilized 4,100 soldiers for door-to-door checks, he said.
But officials, chaplains, soldiers and families say the extended deployments are straining marriages, families and careers.
There is a "trickle-down effect on families," said Chaplain Bill Draper, himself deployed twice since 2006 to Afghanistan.
And some vets, struggling with combat and post-traumatic stress, face difficult returns to a civilian world largely detached from the wars.
"The most difficult time is the transition. It's when we get back and have to retrain ourselves to function in the civilian environment, especially for reservists," said Staff Sgt. Les Newport, an Indiana National Guard spokesman.
"The hardest part was adjusting to the tempo. I was used to 'go go go,' and suddenly, we're in first gear again," agreed Leonard, who returned to his job as a nurse at the Louisville Veterans' Affairs Medical Center after his last tour. "You hear a bang, and you're more alert."
The double impact
Julie Rice, 36, of Louisville, whose physician's assistant husband left last October with the 1163rd medical group to care for detainees near Baghdad, knows first-hand the impact that multiple deployments can have on families.
This is Michael Rice's second — his first was in Afghanistan in 2004, shortly after they got married.
During this second absence, Julie has given birth to twins, and without family in town, she had to drive herself to the hospital. Now, she's juggling a full-time job and two infants while her husband misses a formative year of their children's life, she said. After two, nearly year-long absences, she's wondering what his homecoming will bring later this year.
"It's not what I expected," she said. "My idea was the Guard stays home and the normal military goes overseas."
Army Guard members typically have at least three years between deployments, unless they volunteer to fill a needed slot, officials said. Most deployments last about a year, although that can be shorter depending on the mission. Air Guard members often do much shorter missions — as short as a week, for example, but as long as months at a time.
Nationally, out of a total Guard force of more than 350,000, about a fourth are deployed overseas in every conceivable job: As military police, medics, prison guards, chaplains, public-information officers, pilots, mine-clearing engineers and combat soldiers.
In some recent years, 1,500 Kentucky Guard members on average were deployed overseas at any given time. That figure has declined to about 500 this year, but as the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan continue, the number of Guardsmen seeing their second or third tours are increasing, especially among those trained in military policing and other "force protection" tasks, such as guarding convoys, officials said.
The debate over the Guard's role has spawned a "Bring the Guard Home" movement, backed by a collection of veterans and peace groups, which have unsuccessfully pushed for legislation in 13 other states aimed at limiting overseas deployments. A Maryland legislator earlier this year introduced a bill to prohibit deployments unless Congress declared war, saying overuse had weakened the Guard's readiness.
"When the war first started, the Guard was never expected to pull the missions they have, and I don't think a lot of families were prepared," said Michelle Joyner, of the Washington, D.C.-based National Military Families Association.
But Guard officials cite a history of serving both state and federal needs. A descendant of the Colonial Militia, the Guard played key roles in World War I and World War II. After Vietnam, when leaders avoided mobilizing them for what historians say were political reasons, many came to view it strictly as a domestic force.
Trying to bridge the gaps
Since 2003, the Kentucky Guard has boosted programs to help soldiers and families, including offering marriage counseling and retreats, and summer camps for kids; expanding a family assistance center from two employees to 30; and creating a Yellow Ribbon program for returning soldiers that addresses suicide prevention, post-traumatic stress, VA benefits, job rights and other help.
Multiple deployments present "a challenge, no question about it," said Indiana's Newport. "Not only is it a challenge for the soldier and his family, but his employer."
There are laws to protect Guard member's jobs while they're serving. The federal Uniformed Services Employment and Reemployment Rights Act requires employers to hold jobs for Guard members called up for duty. However, it does not protect them if a factory closes, for example, or if a division is eliminated within a company.
Officials said that's happened in Kentucky only in rare cases, and usually only with smaller companies, such as a three-employee plumbing contractor forced by the poor economy to make cuts.
But there are other stresses. Last year, a U.S. Army study found the incidence of mental health problems climbed significantly for troops returning for third or fourth tours.
It found that among noncommissioned officers, 27 percent on their third and fourth tours suffered mental health problems last year, compared with 18.5 percent on their second tours and 12 percent on their first tours.
Guard officials say it's not clear whether that translates to Guard soldiers, given that many aren't in direct combat roles, but they are working in general to meet mental health needs of returning soldiers.
James Barber, coordinator of the family assistance center, said post-traumatic stress, divorce, and difficulty reintegrating are among the more frequent concerns among returning Guardsmen. Spouses said they struggle to learn new roles such as paying bills or fixing the car, and then struggle to readjust again when the Guardsman returns.
Yvonne Draper, Bill Draper's wife, agreed it can be difficult.
"We've lived alone, got our own schedules, and they pop back in to our lives," she said "He's been in a war zone, and everything's changed for both of us. It takes a very strong marriage."
Digging a 'way back in'
Lt. Col. David Mounkes, a member of the Kentucky Air Guard, was recently at the Louisville International Airport to help welcome a fellow unit member back. Kevin Thornberry, a logistics manager for Toyota, returned after six months coordinating logistics and emergency resupplies for Special Forces troops in Afghanistan.
His wife, Deidre, said his absence meant she had to take a night shift at a Cincinnati Hospital to ensure she could get their kids to activities, while her mother took a voluntary furlough from her job to help. Neighbors cooked her food, and one of her husband's Toyota co-workers helped her with the yard.
"If going once gives an active-duty soldier a break, then I wanted to help," Kevin Thornberry said of his deployment.
But he recognizes that his own home life suffered.
"My place at home is gone," Thornberry admitted. "I'm going to have to dig my way back in."
What the next few years will bring for Guard members is not clear.
The National Military Families Association says the planned drawdown in Iraq, at least so far, is being offset by a ramping up in Afghanistan, and that Guard members shouldn't expect the demand for their service to go away anytime soon.
Meanwhile, Kentucky Gov. Steve Beshear said recently that despite the sacrifices asked of them in recent years, "we take great pride in how our citizen-soldiers and airmen have answered the call of duty."
Alexandra Gonzalez-Waddington is an Augusta GA divorce lawyer & Georgia Military Divorce Lawyer Augusta Georgia domestic mediator. She is an Augusta military divorce lawyer, GA child custody attorney , and Augusta Georgia child support attorney. She offers mediation for divorce, child custody, and child support.
Repeated military missions causing strife in civilian life
By Chris Kenning
When Thomas Leonard joined the Kentucky National Guard in the 1980s, he considered it a part-time job to help pay the bills through college — a commitment of one weekend a month, two weeks a year. Being sent to war barely crossed his mind.
But since 2003, the 46-year-old Louisville medical worker has been deployed overseas twice — once to Iraq, once to Afghanistan — weathering mortar and small-arms attack, nearly two years of absences and jarring returns to civilian life.
"My daughter and sons grew so fast that I remembered them as young children, yet when I came home they were teenagers," he said.
Similar stories are being told across Kentucky, Indiana and the nation, as the fight against terrorism and two wars overseas have radically redefined what it means to be a citizen solider. The Guard is being called up in numbers not seen since World War II, at one point in 2005 making up half the Army's combat force in Iraq.
In Kentucky, 4,170 of the state's 7,208 Army National Guard members were deployed to Afghanistan, Iraq or Guantanamo Bay for up to a year between Sept. 11, 2001, and October 2008. Another 1,005 have been on two deployments — 168 have found themselves on three and even four deployments.
The state's National Air Guard has made 3,558 total deployments since 2001.
The Indiana Guard, meanwhile, has deployed 9,800 Army soldiers and 3,000 Air National Guard members in the War on Terror, according to a June report sent to Gov. Mitch Daniels.
"This is a totally different Guard than it used to be," said David Altom, a spokesman for the Kentucky Guard. "But it's a product of its time."
Col. Phil Miller, the Kentucky Guard's chief of staff, said the deployments and their stresses haven't hampered recruiting, which has exceeded goals for five straight years. Nor has it restricted its ability to respond to state crises, such as the ice storm that hit Kentucky in January, which mobilized 4,100 soldiers for door-to-door checks, he said.
But officials, chaplains, soldiers and families say the extended deployments are straining marriages, families and careers.
There is a "trickle-down effect on families," said Chaplain Bill Draper, himself deployed twice since 2006 to Afghanistan.
And some vets, struggling with combat and post-traumatic stress, face difficult returns to a civilian world largely detached from the wars.
"The most difficult time is the transition. It's when we get back and have to retrain ourselves to function in the civilian environment, especially for reservists," said Staff Sgt. Les Newport, an Indiana National Guard spokesman.
"The hardest part was adjusting to the tempo. I was used to 'go go go,' and suddenly, we're in first gear again," agreed Leonard, who returned to his job as a nurse at the Louisville Veterans' Affairs Medical Center after his last tour. "You hear a bang, and you're more alert."
The double impact
Julie Rice, 36, of Louisville, whose physician's assistant husband left last October with the 1163rd medical group to care for detainees near Baghdad, knows first-hand the impact that multiple deployments can have on families.
This is Michael Rice's second — his first was in Afghanistan in 2004, shortly after they got married.
During this second absence, Julie has given birth to twins, and without family in town, she had to drive herself to the hospital. Now, she's juggling a full-time job and two infants while her husband misses a formative year of their children's life, she said. After two, nearly year-long absences, she's wondering what his homecoming will bring later this year.
"It's not what I expected," she said. "My idea was the Guard stays home and the normal military goes overseas."
Army Guard members typically have at least three years between deployments, unless they volunteer to fill a needed slot, officials said. Most deployments last about a year, although that can be shorter depending on the mission. Air Guard members often do much shorter missions — as short as a week, for example, but as long as months at a time.
Nationally, out of a total Guard force of more than 350,000, about a fourth are deployed overseas in every conceivable job: As military police, medics, prison guards, chaplains, public-information officers, pilots, mine-clearing engineers and combat soldiers.
In some recent years, 1,500 Kentucky Guard members on average were deployed overseas at any given time. That figure has declined to about 500 this year, but as the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan continue, the number of Guardsmen seeing their second or third tours are increasing, especially among those trained in military policing and other "force protection" tasks, such as guarding convoys, officials said.
The debate over the Guard's role has spawned a "Bring the Guard Home" movement, backed by a collection of veterans and peace groups, which have unsuccessfully pushed for legislation in 13 other states aimed at limiting overseas deployments. A Maryland legislator earlier this year introduced a bill to prohibit deployments unless Congress declared war, saying overuse had weakened the Guard's readiness.
"When the war first started, the Guard was never expected to pull the missions they have, and I don't think a lot of families were prepared," said Michelle Joyner, of the Washington, D.C.-based National Military Families Association.
But Guard officials cite a history of serving both state and federal needs. A descendant of the Colonial Militia, the Guard played key roles in World War I and World War II. After Vietnam, when leaders avoided mobilizing them for what historians say were political reasons, many came to view it strictly as a domestic force.
Trying to bridge the gaps
Since 2003, the Kentucky Guard has boosted programs to help soldiers and families, including offering marriage counseling and retreats, and summer camps for kids; expanding a family assistance center from two employees to 30; and creating a Yellow Ribbon program for returning soldiers that addresses suicide prevention, post-traumatic stress, VA benefits, job rights and other help.
Multiple deployments present "a challenge, no question about it," said Indiana's Newport. "Not only is it a challenge for the soldier and his family, but his employer."
There are laws to protect Guard member's jobs while they're serving. The federal Uniformed Services Employment and Reemployment Rights Act requires employers to hold jobs for Guard members called up for duty. However, it does not protect them if a factory closes, for example, or if a division is eliminated within a company.
Officials said that's happened in Kentucky only in rare cases, and usually only with smaller companies, such as a three-employee plumbing contractor forced by the poor economy to make cuts.
But there are other stresses. Last year, a U.S. Army study found the incidence of mental health problems climbed significantly for troops returning for third or fourth tours.
It found that among noncommissioned officers, 27 percent on their third and fourth tours suffered mental health problems last year, compared with 18.5 percent on their second tours and 12 percent on their first tours.
Guard officials say it's not clear whether that translates to Guard soldiers, given that many aren't in direct combat roles, but they are working in general to meet mental health needs of returning soldiers.
James Barber, coordinator of the family assistance center, said post-traumatic stress, divorce, and difficulty reintegrating are among the more frequent concerns among returning Guardsmen. Spouses said they struggle to learn new roles such as paying bills or fixing the car, and then struggle to readjust again when the Guardsman returns.
Yvonne Draper, Bill Draper's wife, agreed it can be difficult.
"We've lived alone, got our own schedules, and they pop back in to our lives," she said "He's been in a war zone, and everything's changed for both of us. It takes a very strong marriage."
Digging a 'way back in'
Lt. Col. David Mounkes, a member of the Kentucky Air Guard, was recently at the Louisville International Airport to help welcome a fellow unit member back. Kevin Thornberry, a logistics manager for Toyota, returned after six months coordinating logistics and emergency resupplies for Special Forces troops in Afghanistan.
His wife, Deidre, said his absence meant she had to take a night shift at a Cincinnati Hospital to ensure she could get their kids to activities, while her mother took a voluntary furlough from her job to help. Neighbors cooked her food, and one of her husband's Toyota co-workers helped her with the yard.
"If going once gives an active-duty soldier a break, then I wanted to help," Kevin Thornberry said of his deployment.
But he recognizes that his own home life suffered.
"My place at home is gone," Thornberry admitted. "I'm going to have to dig my way back in."
What the next few years will bring for Guard members is not clear.
The National Military Families Association says the planned drawdown in Iraq, at least so far, is being offset by a ramping up in Afghanistan, and that Guard members shouldn't expect the demand for their service to go away anytime soon.
Meanwhile, Kentucky Gov. Steve Beshear said recently that despite the sacrifices asked of them in recent years, "we take great pride in how our citizen-soldiers and airmen have answered the call of duty."
Alexandra Gonzalez-Waddington is an Augusta GA divorce lawyer & Georgia Military Divorce Lawyer Augusta Georgia domestic mediator. She is an Augusta military divorce lawyer, GA child custody attorney , and Augusta Georgia child support attorney. She offers mediation for divorce, child custody, and child support.
Augusta GA Divorce Attorney - Sarah Palin Denies Divorce Rumors
Augusta GA Divorce Attorney - Sarah Palin Denies Divorce Rumors
Written by Abel Rodriguez
WASILLA, Alaska - Soon to be ex-Governor Sarah Palin is strongly denying rumors that she and her husband Todd are getting a divorce.
The governor wanted to make it perfectly clear that the divorce rumors are just that...rumors.
She said that she wanted to let the media know that her husband Todd and Nanicka Zapalicka, a 27-year-old stunningly beautiful Eskimo-American salmon fishing guide are just merely soul mates and nothing more.
Governor Palin said that although she has never met Miss Zapalicka in person she has seen three photos of her that Todd keeps in his wallet.
Palin said that her husband told her that Zapalicka has in fact accompanied him on several snowmobile racing trips but that their relationship is strictly platonic, much like Donny and Marie Osmond's.
The governor says that she completely trusts her husband and that when she asked him if he and Nanicka stayed in the same motel room he told her that they do not, but did say that they do occupy rooms adjacent to each other.
Saracuda, as her maternal grandmother calls her, says that she has total confidence that her hubby Todd would never stray, cheat, or be unfaithful.
She smiles that hockey mom smile and asks, "Hey, has everyone already forgotten that I am probably one of the best shots in the entire Northern Hemisphere?"
"Snowplow" Sarah then adds with a tinge of complete confidence, "Todd knows that If I wanted to I could easily shoot the left ear off of a baby cricket at 100 yards."
The Alaskan governor takes a sip from her glass of moose milk and states, "So there is no way on earth that my man is going to mess around with Nanicka Zapalicka, or Jennifer Aniston, or even that letter turnin' Vanna White."
Palin laughs, winks, and adds, "No way, no how, no McCain."
In other news. Queen Latifah is not at all happy with Kim Jong Il's threat to fire a missile at her house. The Queen said, "I will meet that Amy Winehouse-haired, rice-eyed lookin' sumbitch anywhere he wants, a Wal-Mart parking lot, over at the La Brea Tar Pits, or in the outside eating area of a Panda Express."
Alexandra Gonzalez-Waddington is an Augusta GA divorce lawyer & Georgia Military Divorce Lawyer Augusta Georgia domestic mediator. She is an Augusta military divorce lawyer, GA child custody attorney , and Augusta Georgia child support attorney. She offers mediation for divorce, child custody, and child support.
Written by Abel Rodriguez
WASILLA, Alaska - Soon to be ex-Governor Sarah Palin is strongly denying rumors that she and her husband Todd are getting a divorce.
The governor wanted to make it perfectly clear that the divorce rumors are just that...rumors.
She said that she wanted to let the media know that her husband Todd and Nanicka Zapalicka, a 27-year-old stunningly beautiful Eskimo-American salmon fishing guide are just merely soul mates and nothing more.
Governor Palin said that although she has never met Miss Zapalicka in person she has seen three photos of her that Todd keeps in his wallet.
Palin said that her husband told her that Zapalicka has in fact accompanied him on several snowmobile racing trips but that their relationship is strictly platonic, much like Donny and Marie Osmond's.
The governor says that she completely trusts her husband and that when she asked him if he and Nanicka stayed in the same motel room he told her that they do not, but did say that they do occupy rooms adjacent to each other.
Saracuda, as her maternal grandmother calls her, says that she has total confidence that her hubby Todd would never stray, cheat, or be unfaithful.
She smiles that hockey mom smile and asks, "Hey, has everyone already forgotten that I am probably one of the best shots in the entire Northern Hemisphere?"
"Snowplow" Sarah then adds with a tinge of complete confidence, "Todd knows that If I wanted to I could easily shoot the left ear off of a baby cricket at 100 yards."
The Alaskan governor takes a sip from her glass of moose milk and states, "So there is no way on earth that my man is going to mess around with Nanicka Zapalicka, or Jennifer Aniston, or even that letter turnin' Vanna White."
Palin laughs, winks, and adds, "No way, no how, no McCain."
In other news. Queen Latifah is not at all happy with Kim Jong Il's threat to fire a missile at her house. The Queen said, "I will meet that Amy Winehouse-haired, rice-eyed lookin' sumbitch anywhere he wants, a Wal-Mart parking lot, over at the La Brea Tar Pits, or in the outside eating area of a Panda Express."
Alexandra Gonzalez-Waddington is an Augusta GA divorce lawyer & Georgia Military Divorce Lawyer Augusta Georgia domestic mediator. She is an Augusta military divorce lawyer, GA child custody attorney , and Augusta Georgia child support attorney. She offers mediation for divorce, child custody, and child support.
Augusta GA Divorce Attorney - Mom vanishes while pursuing divorce; foul play suspected
Augusta GA Divorce Attorney - Mom vanishes while pursuing divorce; foul play suspected
Renee Pernice disappeared from her home shortly after New Year's this year
Police believe foul play is involved, although they have not found a body
Police say her husband accessed a HazMat building shortly after she disappeared
Attorneys for husband, Shon Pernice, declined comment for this report
From Rupa Mikkilineni
CNN
(CNN) -- Renee Pernice, a 35-year-old mother of two young children, vanished from her home in Kansas City, Missouri, shortly after New Year's this year. She hasn't been heard from since.
Police believe foul play is involved, yet they have not found her body. No one has been arrested in the case.
Police have not named her husband, Shon Pernice, as a person of interest or a suspect in the case. However, "he's the last known person to see her alive," said Doug Niemeier, a sergeant with the Kansas City Police Department.
Six months after Renee Pernice disappeared, police say they still have questions about her husband in the days after her disappearance, including why he allegedly accessed a local fire department's hazardous materials building around 4:30 a.m. January 3.
"It should be noted that multiple types of cleaners, solvents and cleaning supplies are stored at Station #5," a police affidavit says.
Attorneys for Shon Pernice declined to comment for this story. Police and family say Renee was pursuing a divorce around the time she disappeared.
A local firefighter, Shon Pernice has said he was not involved in her disappearance. He told a local activist in March that "I didn't harm my wife one bit. Not at all." In that interview, one of the few in which he's referenced his wife's disappearance, he added, "It's gut-wrenching thinking that either she's got a rich-ass doctor boyfriend somewhere and she's happy, or she's dead."
Since his wife disappeared, Shon Pernice has been arrested twice on unrelated charges: once for allegedly stealing a neighbor's gun and another time for disturbing the peace in an incident with that same neighbor this past July Fourth weekend.
"As everybody knows, my wife has been missing since January 2," he told CNN affiliate KCTV5. "This is what it stems from. Basically what the media ... has portrayed of me -- of the whole situation. There's a lot of people that don't like me."
The couple's two sons, ages 6 and 9, remain in the care of the father, although Renee Pernice's mother has sought custody of them.
"There is a lot that just isn't right," said Rick Pretz, the missing woman's father. "It's not a stable environment for the children."
Renee Pernice was known for being a caring mother, a talented nurse at St. Luke's Hospital and a gentle animal lover always surrounded by dogs. Neighbors say they last saw her in her backyard with her dogs the morning of Friday, January 2, 2009. When police searched the home, they say they found her purse, coat and other items still in the house. Her car was in the garage.
Police say her cell phone was missing from the house. A homeless man found the phone in grass about 15 miles from her home, in an area Renee Pernice was not known to frequent, police say. It was found around midnight January 3, the affidavit says.
Since then, police and volunteer teams have searched the area extensively, but they have found nothing.
"Family members and common friends of both Shon and Renee told police that Renee was not the kind of mother who would separate herself from her children for any reason," the affidavit says. "Family members advised that finding Renee's purse at the residence was highly unusual as she never went anywhere without her purse."
According to the affidavit, investigators watched Shon Pernice drive away from the home with his wife's dog and drop it off at a park a few days after he reported his wife missing. The affidavit also alleges that a drop of blood was found in the garage. However, authorities have not released whether it matched Renee Pernice or her husband.
According to Renee Pernice's family, she was not the kind of person to take off on her own without letting her family know where she was. "I spoke to her just the night before at 7 p.m. on the phone," her father told CNN. "She would never leave her two sons like this."
The family is offering a $25,000 reward for any information leading to the whereabouts of Renee Pernice. A white truck that could be related to her disappearance was captured on a surveillance tape in the area where her cell phone was found, and police have released a photo of it. Anyone who may have lent such a truck at the time the surveillance image was taken is being asked to come forward.
Alexandra Gonzalez-Waddington is an Augusta GA divorce lawyer & Georgia Military Divorce Lawyer Augusta Georgia domestic mediator. She is an Augusta military divorce lawyer, GA child custody attorney , and Augusta Georgia child support attorney. She offers mediation for divorce, child custody, and child support.
Renee Pernice disappeared from her home shortly after New Year's this year
Police believe foul play is involved, although they have not found a body
Police say her husband accessed a HazMat building shortly after she disappeared
Attorneys for husband, Shon Pernice, declined comment for this report
From Rupa Mikkilineni
CNN
(CNN) -- Renee Pernice, a 35-year-old mother of two young children, vanished from her home in Kansas City, Missouri, shortly after New Year's this year. She hasn't been heard from since.
Police believe foul play is involved, yet they have not found her body. No one has been arrested in the case.
Police have not named her husband, Shon Pernice, as a person of interest or a suspect in the case. However, "he's the last known person to see her alive," said Doug Niemeier, a sergeant with the Kansas City Police Department.
Six months after Renee Pernice disappeared, police say they still have questions about her husband in the days after her disappearance, including why he allegedly accessed a local fire department's hazardous materials building around 4:30 a.m. January 3.
"It should be noted that multiple types of cleaners, solvents and cleaning supplies are stored at Station #5," a police affidavit says.
Attorneys for Shon Pernice declined to comment for this story. Police and family say Renee was pursuing a divorce around the time she disappeared.
A local firefighter, Shon Pernice has said he was not involved in her disappearance. He told a local activist in March that "I didn't harm my wife one bit. Not at all." In that interview, one of the few in which he's referenced his wife's disappearance, he added, "It's gut-wrenching thinking that either she's got a rich-ass doctor boyfriend somewhere and she's happy, or she's dead."
Since his wife disappeared, Shon Pernice has been arrested twice on unrelated charges: once for allegedly stealing a neighbor's gun and another time for disturbing the peace in an incident with that same neighbor this past July Fourth weekend.
"As everybody knows, my wife has been missing since January 2," he told CNN affiliate KCTV5. "This is what it stems from. Basically what the media ... has portrayed of me -- of the whole situation. There's a lot of people that don't like me."
The couple's two sons, ages 6 and 9, remain in the care of the father, although Renee Pernice's mother has sought custody of them.
"There is a lot that just isn't right," said Rick Pretz, the missing woman's father. "It's not a stable environment for the children."
Renee Pernice was known for being a caring mother, a talented nurse at St. Luke's Hospital and a gentle animal lover always surrounded by dogs. Neighbors say they last saw her in her backyard with her dogs the morning of Friday, January 2, 2009. When police searched the home, they say they found her purse, coat and other items still in the house. Her car was in the garage.
Police say her cell phone was missing from the house. A homeless man found the phone in grass about 15 miles from her home, in an area Renee Pernice was not known to frequent, police say. It was found around midnight January 3, the affidavit says.
Since then, police and volunteer teams have searched the area extensively, but they have found nothing.
"Family members and common friends of both Shon and Renee told police that Renee was not the kind of mother who would separate herself from her children for any reason," the affidavit says. "Family members advised that finding Renee's purse at the residence was highly unusual as she never went anywhere without her purse."
According to the affidavit, investigators watched Shon Pernice drive away from the home with his wife's dog and drop it off at a park a few days after he reported his wife missing. The affidavit also alleges that a drop of blood was found in the garage. However, authorities have not released whether it matched Renee Pernice or her husband.
According to Renee Pernice's family, she was not the kind of person to take off on her own without letting her family know where she was. "I spoke to her just the night before at 7 p.m. on the phone," her father told CNN. "She would never leave her two sons like this."
The family is offering a $25,000 reward for any information leading to the whereabouts of Renee Pernice. A white truck that could be related to her disappearance was captured on a surveillance tape in the area where her cell phone was found, and police have released a photo of it. Anyone who may have lent such a truck at the time the surveillance image was taken is being asked to come forward.
Alexandra Gonzalez-Waddington is an Augusta GA divorce lawyer & Georgia Military Divorce Lawyer Augusta Georgia domestic mediator. She is an Augusta military divorce lawyer, GA child custody attorney , and Augusta Georgia child support attorney. She offers mediation for divorce, child custody, and child support.
Augusta GA Divorce Attorney - Divorce Drama Nearly Turns Deadly
Augusta GA Divorce Attorney - Divorce Drama Nearly Turns Deadly
Advertising Executive Is Accused of Kidnapping, Arson and More
By IMAEYEN IBANGA and ERIN C. KEOHANE
A disgruntled Connecticut man allegedly took drastic measures following his divorce, including taking his wife hostage, burning down the home they once shared and engaging in a 13-hour standoff -- all to avoid the breakup.
Richard Shenkman, 60, who is accused of abducting his ex-wife Nancy Tyler, 57, in Hartford, Conn., Tuesday and holding her hostage for several hours in the couple's South Windsor, Conn., home, was arraigned in his hospital room Wednesday on kidnapping charges.
Bond was set at $12.5 million on charges including kidnapping, arson, the unlawful discharge of a firearm and reckless endangerment. Shenkman is due in court July 14.
These criminal charges are just the latest in a long list Shenkman faces that began during his divorce proceedings. Other pending criminal charges against him include threatening, violating protective orders and forgery.
The couple's appellate court file includes a cassette tape of more than a dozen voice mail messages from Shenkman to Tyler that contain numerous threats.
"We are not getting divorced," he said in one message. "It is not going to happen. Listen to my words. We're not divorced. We're not getting divorced. We were married 'til death do us part. We made vows in front of God. He was our witness, and you can only get your divorce one way, and that's death. You can only be unmarried by death."
The newest accusations against Shenkman result from a tense standoff that served as a pique for three years of contentious divorce proceedings between Shenkman and Tyler.
Divorce Drama Unfolds
Shenkman, an advertising executive, and Tyler married in 1993.
Tyler is a medical malpractice lawyer who worked for Shenkman's advertising firm in Bloomfield, Conn.
A judge granted the pair a divorce last year, though Shenkman had been appealing. The state appellate court, in a decision released Tuesday, rejected Shenkman's appeal.
The divorce drama began when Shenkman allegedly burned the couple's beach home in East Lyme, Conn., in 2007 just hours before he was to hand it over to Tyler. It reached a fevered pitch this week when Shenkman allegedly held Tyler hostage in their South Windsor home.
Though Shenkman turned over the South Windsor house to Tyler as part of their divorce, she accused him of disobeying the judge's orders to move out. Police said Shenkman kept Tyler inside the home against her will and made several demands during the standoff.
With a SWAT team and bomb squad in place, Shenkman made a series of phone calls from inside the home to The Day reporter Karen Florin, an acquaintance of the couple.
"From the beginning he said, 'We're not getting divorced. We're going to die,'" Florin said.
"We would like to post something [on the Web]," Florin told Shenkman during one of their phone calls.
"Don't do it! I see something on your Web site, Nancy's dead!" he said. "I've lived in this house for 35 years and I'm leaving it in a body bag."
Florin said Shenkman made 12 demands, saying if they weren't met he would blow up the house.
"He kept saying, which was really chilling, that he wanted a priest to come over and give last rites to his wife," Florin said. "He said he wanted the judge who had divorced them to come over and remarry them."
"How about the priest?" Shenkman said on a recording. "They are really pissing me off about the priest. That was my first demand."
After hours of negotiating, the divorcee put his wife on the phone.
"Whatever you want to say, Nancy, I don't want this to be like I'm controlling you, telling you what to say," Shenkman told Tyler.
"I don't want either of us to be hurt, I want to come through this and move on. There's nothing here that can't be undone," Tyler said.
With a handcuff dangling from her wrist, Tyler was able to escape. Authorities believe Shenkman then went room to room setting the house ablaze.
"She had ... pulled a pole out of the wall that was attached to her handcuff and ran out the basement door when he went to investigate a noise," Florin said. "She thought she was going to die."
Tyler is now with relatives at an undisclosed location.
A bomb squad searched the smoldering site of the suburban Hartford home for signs of explosives Wednesday, but there were no explosive devices confirmed.
Shenkman's attorney said his client, who was in stable condition at Hartford Hospital after being treated for smoke inhalation, is now under the care of a psychiatrist.
Alexandra Gonzalez-Waddington is an Augusta GA divorce lawyer & Georgia Military Divorce Lawyer Augusta Georgia domestic mediator. She is an Augusta military divorce lawyer, GA child custody attorney , and Augusta Georgia child support attorney. She offers mediation for divorce, child custody, and child support.
Advertising Executive Is Accused of Kidnapping, Arson and More
By IMAEYEN IBANGA and ERIN C. KEOHANE
A disgruntled Connecticut man allegedly took drastic measures following his divorce, including taking his wife hostage, burning down the home they once shared and engaging in a 13-hour standoff -- all to avoid the breakup.
Richard Shenkman, 60, who is accused of abducting his ex-wife Nancy Tyler, 57, in Hartford, Conn., Tuesday and holding her hostage for several hours in the couple's South Windsor, Conn., home, was arraigned in his hospital room Wednesday on kidnapping charges.
Bond was set at $12.5 million on charges including kidnapping, arson, the unlawful discharge of a firearm and reckless endangerment. Shenkman is due in court July 14.
These criminal charges are just the latest in a long list Shenkman faces that began during his divorce proceedings. Other pending criminal charges against him include threatening, violating protective orders and forgery.
The couple's appellate court file includes a cassette tape of more than a dozen voice mail messages from Shenkman to Tyler that contain numerous threats.
"We are not getting divorced," he said in one message. "It is not going to happen. Listen to my words. We're not divorced. We're not getting divorced. We were married 'til death do us part. We made vows in front of God. He was our witness, and you can only get your divorce one way, and that's death. You can only be unmarried by death."
The newest accusations against Shenkman result from a tense standoff that served as a pique for three years of contentious divorce proceedings between Shenkman and Tyler.
Divorce Drama Unfolds
Shenkman, an advertising executive, and Tyler married in 1993.
Tyler is a medical malpractice lawyer who worked for Shenkman's advertising firm in Bloomfield, Conn.
A judge granted the pair a divorce last year, though Shenkman had been appealing. The state appellate court, in a decision released Tuesday, rejected Shenkman's appeal.
The divorce drama began when Shenkman allegedly burned the couple's beach home in East Lyme, Conn., in 2007 just hours before he was to hand it over to Tyler. It reached a fevered pitch this week when Shenkman allegedly held Tyler hostage in their South Windsor home.
Though Shenkman turned over the South Windsor house to Tyler as part of their divorce, she accused him of disobeying the judge's orders to move out. Police said Shenkman kept Tyler inside the home against her will and made several demands during the standoff.
With a SWAT team and bomb squad in place, Shenkman made a series of phone calls from inside the home to The Day reporter Karen Florin, an acquaintance of the couple.
"From the beginning he said, 'We're not getting divorced. We're going to die,'" Florin said.
"We would like to post something [on the Web]," Florin told Shenkman during one of their phone calls.
"Don't do it! I see something on your Web site, Nancy's dead!" he said. "I've lived in this house for 35 years and I'm leaving it in a body bag."
Florin said Shenkman made 12 demands, saying if they weren't met he would blow up the house.
"He kept saying, which was really chilling, that he wanted a priest to come over and give last rites to his wife," Florin said. "He said he wanted the judge who had divorced them to come over and remarry them."
"How about the priest?" Shenkman said on a recording. "They are really pissing me off about the priest. That was my first demand."
After hours of negotiating, the divorcee put his wife on the phone.
"Whatever you want to say, Nancy, I don't want this to be like I'm controlling you, telling you what to say," Shenkman told Tyler.
"I don't want either of us to be hurt, I want to come through this and move on. There's nothing here that can't be undone," Tyler said.
With a handcuff dangling from her wrist, Tyler was able to escape. Authorities believe Shenkman then went room to room setting the house ablaze.
"She had ... pulled a pole out of the wall that was attached to her handcuff and ran out the basement door when he went to investigate a noise," Florin said. "She thought she was going to die."
Tyler is now with relatives at an undisclosed location.
A bomb squad searched the smoldering site of the suburban Hartford home for signs of explosives Wednesday, but there were no explosive devices confirmed.
Shenkman's attorney said his client, who was in stable condition at Hartford Hospital after being treated for smoke inhalation, is now under the care of a psychiatrist.
Alexandra Gonzalez-Waddington is an Augusta GA divorce lawyer & Georgia Military Divorce Lawyer Augusta Georgia domestic mediator. She is an Augusta military divorce lawyer, GA child custody attorney , and Augusta Georgia child support attorney. She offers mediation for divorce, child custody, and child support.
Augusta Georgia Divorce Lawyer - Conn. hostage taker demands priest for last rites
Conn. hostage taker demands priest for last rites
1 hour ago
SOUTH WINDSOR, Conn. (AP) — A Connecticut advertising executive who police say is holding his ex-wife hostage has told a reporter he wants a priest brought in to give the woman her last rites. Richard Shenkman said in a phone call Tuesday to a reporter with The Day of New London that he will release his ex-wife from his South Windsor home if police meet several demands.
One demand was to provide a priest to give Nancy Tyler her last rites. A priest is at the scene. Police say the 60-year-old Shenkman kidnapped his ex-wife in Hartford from a parking ramp this morning.
Shenkman's lawyer says his client and the 57-year-old Tyler have shared three years of contentious divorce proceedings. Shenkman is accused of burning down the couple's beach home in 2007.
___
Information from: The Day, http://www.theday.com
THIS IS A BREAKING NEWS UPDATE. Check back soon for further information. AP's earlier story is below.
SOUTH WINDSOR, Conn. (AP) — An advertising executive kidnapped his ex-wife from a parking garage Tuesday, held her hostage for hours in a suburban Hartford home and fired shots as police negotiators and a bomb squad waited outside, authorities said.
Richard Shenkman, 60, missed a meeting with lawyer Hugh Keefe at Hartford Superior Court on Tuesday morning and was supposed to vacate the home later in the day, the attorney said.
"I hope it ends peacefully without any more violence," Keefe said.
Police blocked off streets around 11 a.m. near the home on Tumblebrook Drive in South Windsor that the couple used to share. Nearly six hours later, the situation continued.
Police negotiators and the Hartford bomb squad were at the scene, and authorities said they were communicating with two people in the home. South Windsor police Cmdr. Matthew Reed said there was no confirmation of explosives in the house.
Shenkman was "irritated" by stories on the Hartford Courant's Web site and demanded that the information be removed by 2:30 p.m., Reed said. A story naming Shenkman and ex-wife Nancy Tyler remained on the paper's Web site after that time; a message was left by The Associated Press for interim Editor Naedine Hazell.
"The request has been that he does not want the publicity at this point. He does not want names out there or details of the incident," Reed said.
Shenkman made other demands, said Reed, who would not elaborate.
Shenkman and Tyler, 57, have shared three years of contentious divorce proceedings, Keefe said. They married in 1993; a judge granted the divorce last year, but Shenkman has been appealing.
The state Appellate Court, in a decision officially released Tuesday, rejected Shenkman's appeal. Shenkman had sought to delay the divorce proceedings until an arson case against him was resolved.
He is accused of burning down the couple's beach home in East Lyme in 2007, hours before he was to hand it over to Tyler. The case is pending in New London Superior Court.
Shenkman also has other pending criminal charges, including threatening, violating a protective order and forgery, according to the state Judicial Branch.
Tyler's lawyer, Norm Pattis, said Shenkman's behavior during the divorce trial was "menacing, threatening, nothing short of bizarre."
"The reports that he abducted Ms. Tyler ... is consistent with the level of irrationality that he displayed throughout the proceedings," Pattis said. "I hope the police will take prompt and decisive action to make sure no harm comes to Ms. Tyler."
Tyler is a medical malpractice lawyer who at one point worked for Shenkman's advertising firm in Bloomfield, according to divorce records. The firm produced "The Gayle King Show" and did commercials for state government, the records say.
"Welcome to the war of the Tylers," Shenkman wrote in an e-mail to Pettis last year, according to court records. "Get ready for a wild and crazy ride on a runaway train. It's about to derail."
Pattis showed the e-mail to a judge and said it would be unfair "to have this court held hostage by a sociopath," the court records say.
Shortly before the trial, the records how, Shenkman was hospitalized because his lawyer thought he might be a danger to himself.
Associated Press writers Dave Collins and Katie Nelson in Hartford contributed to this report.
Copyright © 2009 The Associated Press.
Alexandra Gonzalez-Waddington is an Augusta GA divorce lawyer & Georgia Military Divorce Lawyer Augusta Georgia domestic mediator. She is an Augusta military divorce lawyer, GA child custody attorney , and Augusta Georgia child support attorney. She offers mediation for divorce, child custody, and child support.
1 hour ago
SOUTH WINDSOR, Conn. (AP) — A Connecticut advertising executive who police say is holding his ex-wife hostage has told a reporter he wants a priest brought in to give the woman her last rites. Richard Shenkman said in a phone call Tuesday to a reporter with The Day of New London that he will release his ex-wife from his South Windsor home if police meet several demands.
One demand was to provide a priest to give Nancy Tyler her last rites. A priest is at the scene. Police say the 60-year-old Shenkman kidnapped his ex-wife in Hartford from a parking ramp this morning.
Shenkman's lawyer says his client and the 57-year-old Tyler have shared three years of contentious divorce proceedings. Shenkman is accused of burning down the couple's beach home in 2007.
___
Information from: The Day, http://www.theday.com
THIS IS A BREAKING NEWS UPDATE. Check back soon for further information. AP's earlier story is below.
SOUTH WINDSOR, Conn. (AP) — An advertising executive kidnapped his ex-wife from a parking garage Tuesday, held her hostage for hours in a suburban Hartford home and fired shots as police negotiators and a bomb squad waited outside, authorities said.
Richard Shenkman, 60, missed a meeting with lawyer Hugh Keefe at Hartford Superior Court on Tuesday morning and was supposed to vacate the home later in the day, the attorney said.
"I hope it ends peacefully without any more violence," Keefe said.
Police blocked off streets around 11 a.m. near the home on Tumblebrook Drive in South Windsor that the couple used to share. Nearly six hours later, the situation continued.
Police negotiators and the Hartford bomb squad were at the scene, and authorities said they were communicating with two people in the home. South Windsor police Cmdr. Matthew Reed said there was no confirmation of explosives in the house.
Shenkman was "irritated" by stories on the Hartford Courant's Web site and demanded that the information be removed by 2:30 p.m., Reed said. A story naming Shenkman and ex-wife Nancy Tyler remained on the paper's Web site after that time; a message was left by The Associated Press for interim Editor Naedine Hazell.
"The request has been that he does not want the publicity at this point. He does not want names out there or details of the incident," Reed said.
Shenkman made other demands, said Reed, who would not elaborate.
Shenkman and Tyler, 57, have shared three years of contentious divorce proceedings, Keefe said. They married in 1993; a judge granted the divorce last year, but Shenkman has been appealing.
The state Appellate Court, in a decision officially released Tuesday, rejected Shenkman's appeal. Shenkman had sought to delay the divorce proceedings until an arson case against him was resolved.
He is accused of burning down the couple's beach home in East Lyme in 2007, hours before he was to hand it over to Tyler. The case is pending in New London Superior Court.
Shenkman also has other pending criminal charges, including threatening, violating a protective order and forgery, according to the state Judicial Branch.
Tyler's lawyer, Norm Pattis, said Shenkman's behavior during the divorce trial was "menacing, threatening, nothing short of bizarre."
"The reports that he abducted Ms. Tyler ... is consistent with the level of irrationality that he displayed throughout the proceedings," Pattis said. "I hope the police will take prompt and decisive action to make sure no harm comes to Ms. Tyler."
Tyler is a medical malpractice lawyer who at one point worked for Shenkman's advertising firm in Bloomfield, according to divorce records. The firm produced "The Gayle King Show" and did commercials for state government, the records say.
"Welcome to the war of the Tylers," Shenkman wrote in an e-mail to Pettis last year, according to court records. "Get ready for a wild and crazy ride on a runaway train. It's about to derail."
Pattis showed the e-mail to a judge and said it would be unfair "to have this court held hostage by a sociopath," the court records say.
Shortly before the trial, the records how, Shenkman was hospitalized because his lawyer thought he might be a danger to himself.
Associated Press writers Dave Collins and Katie Nelson in Hartford contributed to this report.
Copyright © 2009 The Associated Press.
Alexandra Gonzalez-Waddington is an Augusta GA divorce lawyer & Georgia Military Divorce Lawyer Augusta Georgia domestic mediator. She is an Augusta military divorce lawyer, GA child custody attorney , and Augusta Georgia child support attorney. She offers mediation for divorce, child custody, and child support.
Augusta GA Divorce Attorney - Recession adds to financial burden of divorce
Augusta GA Divorce Attorney - Recession adds to financial burden of divorce
BY KATHLEEN KERR
Just before the recession began battering their finances in 2007, a Huntington couple decided to divorce, planning to split the proceeds of their house, appraised at $1.5 million just a year earlier.
But soon after that, their home's value plunged.
Joseph C., an industrial equipment distributor, and his wife had a $600,000 jumbo mortgage to pay off and a real estate market that forced them to sell the house for only $900,000. The couple did not want to be identified.
"It was basically the roosters came home to roost," Joseph C. said. "We had thought there would be a lot more equity."
Alexandra Gonzalez-Waddington is an Augusta GA divorce lawyer & Georgia Military Divorce Lawyer Augusta Georgia domestic mediator. She is an Augusta military divorce lawyer, GA child custody attorney , and Augusta Georgia child support attorney. She offers mediation for divorce, child custody, and child support.
BY KATHLEEN KERR
Just before the recession began battering their finances in 2007, a Huntington couple decided to divorce, planning to split the proceeds of their house, appraised at $1.5 million just a year earlier.
But soon after that, their home's value plunged.
Joseph C., an industrial equipment distributor, and his wife had a $600,000 jumbo mortgage to pay off and a real estate market that forced them to sell the house for only $900,000. The couple did not want to be identified.
"It was basically the roosters came home to roost," Joseph C. said. "We had thought there would be a lot more equity."
Alexandra Gonzalez-Waddington is an Augusta GA divorce lawyer & Georgia Military Divorce Lawyer Augusta Georgia domestic mediator. She is an Augusta military divorce lawyer, GA child custody attorney , and Augusta Georgia child support attorney. She offers mediation for divorce, child custody, and child support.
Augusta GA Divorce Attorney - Minimizing the financial fallout of divorce
Augusta GA Divorce Attorney - Minimizing the financial fallout of divorce
BY DERRICK KINNEY
Divorce is difficult, both emotionally and financially. As you navigate the challenging territory of divorce proceedings, it’s important to protect your financial interests. You can save yourself time, money and additional strife down the road by being proactive and informed and doing your best to arrive at a fair settlement the first time around.
Get a handle on your finances. If you are preparing to divorce, you need a solid understanding of your financial situation. If you haven’t been in charge of the checkbook or other financial matters, you will have your work cut out for you to determine where your household stands financially. Hopefully your spouse is forthcoming about financial matters, but if that is not the case, seek professional assistance from a forensic accountant to investigate potential hidden assets.
Split assets equitably. Divorce laws vary by state, but in general, the assets you gained during your marriage — even if they were earned through individual effort — must be divided equally. Be careful about accepting too much of your share of assets in a form that is costly or difficult to liquidate. For example, a house may be worth a large sum, but if you have to live in it, you won’t have access to its value to pay for groceries unless you take out a home equity loan. Cash and stocks, on the other hand, provide a more immediate source of income. Therefore, if you own a house but foresee limited future income, you may be better off selling the house and splitting the proceeds, along with other assets you jointly share. Retirement accounts are also fair game in divorce settlements. If your spouse has a qualified retirement plan, your share of the assets can be transferred to another retirement plan through a Qualified Domestic Relations Order (QDRO). Because there are special tax considerations involved, you should consult a tax adviser or financial planner to avoid a tax bill you can’t afford.
Divide and conquer your debts. If you can, try to pay off and/or close joint accounts before entering divorce negotiations. Debts incurred during marriage will follow you, and if your former spouse fails to pay even after he or she has agreed to take on the responsibility, the debtor can go after you to resolve the debt. If you are concerned that your spouse will generate more debt before your divorce is finalized, contact your creditors in writing to let them know of your impending divorce and that you wish to close accounts and will not be responsible for debts incurred beyond the date of your communication.
Pay attention to taxes. Liquidation of real estate, stocks and mutual funds you receive through a divorce decree may result in taxable capital gains or losses. It may be particularly important to consider the rules around the exclusion of gain on the sale of your home. Even alimony is taxed as ordinary income to the recipient and it is a tax deduction for the person paying alimony. Before finalizing your divorce settlement, consult a tax adviser to determine your tax obligation. Like credit card debt, tax debt can also follow you after divorce, so pay close attention to your tax returns and resolve any tax liens to avoid trouble with the IRS.
Determine alimony and child support. Alimony laws vary by state. Where alimony applies, the primary breadwinner may be required to provide the dependent spouse with support and maintenance payments. In addition, both parents are expected to contribute to the financial support of their children. It’s better to negotiate an amount that you both can live with than let the courts decide your fate. You may want to insure your alimony or child support in the event of death or disability of your spouse. If you do, make sure you are the owner or irrevocable beneficiary, or you could lose out if your ex decides to stop making payments or changes the beneficiary status.
Plan for your future. Once you have divided your assets, arrange to meet with a financial advisor to create a new financial plan that takes into account your individual hopes and dreams for the future. If you take these simple precautions to manage the financial side of a marital split, you will establish a stronger foundation on which to build a new life for yourself.
Alexandra Gonzalez-Waddington is an Augusta GA divorce lawyer & Georgia Military Divorce Lawyer Augusta Georgia domestic mediator. She is an Augusta military divorce lawyer, GA child custody attorney , and Augusta Georgia child support attorney. She offers mediation for divorce, child custody, and child support.
BY DERRICK KINNEY
Divorce is difficult, both emotionally and financially. As you navigate the challenging territory of divorce proceedings, it’s important to protect your financial interests. You can save yourself time, money and additional strife down the road by being proactive and informed and doing your best to arrive at a fair settlement the first time around.
Get a handle on your finances. If you are preparing to divorce, you need a solid understanding of your financial situation. If you haven’t been in charge of the checkbook or other financial matters, you will have your work cut out for you to determine where your household stands financially. Hopefully your spouse is forthcoming about financial matters, but if that is not the case, seek professional assistance from a forensic accountant to investigate potential hidden assets.
Split assets equitably. Divorce laws vary by state, but in general, the assets you gained during your marriage — even if they were earned through individual effort — must be divided equally. Be careful about accepting too much of your share of assets in a form that is costly or difficult to liquidate. For example, a house may be worth a large sum, but if you have to live in it, you won’t have access to its value to pay for groceries unless you take out a home equity loan. Cash and stocks, on the other hand, provide a more immediate source of income. Therefore, if you own a house but foresee limited future income, you may be better off selling the house and splitting the proceeds, along with other assets you jointly share. Retirement accounts are also fair game in divorce settlements. If your spouse has a qualified retirement plan, your share of the assets can be transferred to another retirement plan through a Qualified Domestic Relations Order (QDRO). Because there are special tax considerations involved, you should consult a tax adviser or financial planner to avoid a tax bill you can’t afford.
Divide and conquer your debts. If you can, try to pay off and/or close joint accounts before entering divorce negotiations. Debts incurred during marriage will follow you, and if your former spouse fails to pay even after he or she has agreed to take on the responsibility, the debtor can go after you to resolve the debt. If you are concerned that your spouse will generate more debt before your divorce is finalized, contact your creditors in writing to let them know of your impending divorce and that you wish to close accounts and will not be responsible for debts incurred beyond the date of your communication.
Pay attention to taxes. Liquidation of real estate, stocks and mutual funds you receive through a divorce decree may result in taxable capital gains or losses. It may be particularly important to consider the rules around the exclusion of gain on the sale of your home. Even alimony is taxed as ordinary income to the recipient and it is a tax deduction for the person paying alimony. Before finalizing your divorce settlement, consult a tax adviser to determine your tax obligation. Like credit card debt, tax debt can also follow you after divorce, so pay close attention to your tax returns and resolve any tax liens to avoid trouble with the IRS.
Determine alimony and child support. Alimony laws vary by state. Where alimony applies, the primary breadwinner may be required to provide the dependent spouse with support and maintenance payments. In addition, both parents are expected to contribute to the financial support of their children. It’s better to negotiate an amount that you both can live with than let the courts decide your fate. You may want to insure your alimony or child support in the event of death or disability of your spouse. If you do, make sure you are the owner or irrevocable beneficiary, or you could lose out if your ex decides to stop making payments or changes the beneficiary status.
Plan for your future. Once you have divided your assets, arrange to meet with a financial advisor to create a new financial plan that takes into account your individual hopes and dreams for the future. If you take these simple precautions to manage the financial side of a marital split, you will establish a stronger foundation on which to build a new life for yourself.
Alexandra Gonzalez-Waddington is an Augusta GA divorce lawyer & Georgia Military Divorce Lawyer Augusta Georgia domestic mediator. She is an Augusta military divorce lawyer, GA child custody attorney , and Augusta Georgia child support attorney. She offers mediation for divorce, child custody, and child support.
Augusta GA Military Divorce Lawyer - Guard families struggle with deployments
Augusta GA Military Divorce Lawyer - Guard families struggle with deployments
Repeated military missions causing strife in civilian life
By Chris Kenning
When Thomas Leonard joined the Kentucky National Guard in the 1980s, he considered it a part-time job to help pay the bills through college — a commitment of one weekend a month, two weeks a year. Being sent to war barely crossed his mind.
But since 2003, the 46-year-old Louisville medical worker has been deployed overseas twice — once to Iraq, once to Afghanistan — weathering mortar and small-arms attack, nearly two years of absences and jarring returns to civilian life.
"My daughter and sons grew so fast that I remembered them as young children, yet when I came home they were teenagers," he said.
Similar stories are being told across Kentucky, Indiana and the nation, as the fight against terrorism and two wars overseas have radically redefined what it means to be a citizen solider. The Guard is being called up in numbers not seen since World War II, at one point in 2005 making up half the Army's combat force in Iraq.
In Kentucky, 4,170 of the state's 7,208 Army National Guard members were deployed to Afghanistan, Iraq or Guantanamo Bay for up to a year between Sept. 11, 2001, and October 2008. Another 1,005 have been on two deployments — 168 have found themselves on three and even four deployments.
The state's National Air Guard has made 3,558 total deployments since 2001.
The Indiana Guard, meanwhile, has deployed 9,800 Army soldiers and 3,000 Air National Guard members in the War on Terror, according to a June report sent to Gov. Mitch Daniels.
"This is a totally different Guard than it used to be," said David Altom, a spokesman for the Kentucky Guard. "But it's a product of its time."
Col. Phil Miller, the Kentucky Guard's chief of staff, said the deployments and their stresses haven't hampered recruiting, which has exceeded goals for five straight years. Nor has it restricted its ability to respond to state crises, such as the ice storm that hit Kentucky in January, which mobilized 4,100 soldiers for door-to-door checks, he said.
But officials, chaplains, soldiers and families say the extended deployments are straining marriages, families and careers.
There is a "trickle-down effect on families," said Chaplain Bill Draper, himself deployed twice since 2006 to Afghanistan.
And some vets, struggling with combat and post-traumatic stress, face difficult returns to a civilian world largely detached from the wars.
"The most difficult time is the transition. It's when we get back and have to retrain ourselves to function in the civilian environment, especially for reservists," said Staff Sgt. Les Newport, an Indiana National Guard spokesman.
"The hardest part was adjusting to the tempo. I was used to 'go go go,' and suddenly, we're in first gear again," agreed Leonard, who returned to his job as a nurse at the Louisville Veterans' Affairs Medical Center after his last tour. "You hear a bang, and you're more alert."
The double impact
Julie Rice, 36, of Louisville, whose physician's assistant husband left last October with the 1163rd medical group to care for detainees near Baghdad, knows first-hand the impact that multiple deployments can have on families.
This is Michael Rice's second — his first was in Afghanistan in 2004, shortly after they got married.
During this second absence, Julie has given birth to twins, and without family in town, she had to drive herself to the hospital. Now, she's juggling a full-time job and two infants while her husband misses a formative year of their children's life, she said. After two, nearly year-long absences, she's wondering what his homecoming will bring later this year.
"It's not what I expected," she said. "My idea was the Guard stays home and the normal military goes overseas."
Army Guard members typically have at least three years between deployments, unless they volunteer to fill a needed slot, officials said. Most deployments last about a year, although that can be shorter depending on the mission. Air Guard members often do much shorter missions — as short as a week, for example, but as long as months at a time.
Nationally, out of a total Guard force of more than 350,000, about a fourth are deployed overseas in every conceivable job: As military police, medics, prison guards, chaplains, public-information officers, pilots, mine-clearing engineers and combat soldiers.
In some recent years, 1,500 Kentucky Guard members on average were deployed overseas at any given time. That figure has declined to about 500 this year, but as the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan continue, the number of Guardsmen seeing their second or third tours are increasing, especially among those trained in military policing and other "force protection" tasks, such as guarding convoys, officials said.
The debate over the Guard's role has spawned a "Bring the Guard Home" movement, backed by a collection of veterans and peace groups, which have unsuccessfully pushed for legislation in 13 other states aimed at limiting overseas deployments. A Maryland legislator earlier this year introduced a bill to prohibit deployments unless Congress declared war, saying overuse had weakened the Guard's readiness.
"When the war first started, the Guard was never expected to pull the missions they have, and I don't think a lot of families were prepared," said Michelle Joyner, of the Washington, D.C.-based National Military Families Association.
But Guard officials cite a history of serving both state and federal needs. A descendant of the Colonial Militia, the Guard played key roles in World War I and World War II. After Vietnam, when leaders avoided mobilizing them for what historians say were political reasons, many came to view it strictly as a domestic force.
Trying to bridge the gaps
Since 2003, the Kentucky Guard has boosted programs to help soldiers and families, including offering marriage counseling and retreats, and summer camps for kids; expanding a family assistance center from two employees to 30; and creating a Yellow Ribbon program for returning soldiers that addresses suicide prevention, post-traumatic stress, VA benefits, job rights and other help.
Multiple deployments present "a challenge, no question about it," said Indiana's Newport. "Not only is it a challenge for the soldier and his family, but his employer."
There are laws to protect Guard member's jobs while they're serving. The federal Uniformed Services Employment and Reemployment Rights Act requires employers to hold jobs for Guard members called up for duty. However, it does not protect them if a factory closes, for example, or if a division is eliminated within a company.
Officials said that's happened in Kentucky only in rare cases, and usually only with smaller companies, such as a three-employee plumbing contractor forced by the poor economy to make cuts.
But there are other stresses. Last year, a U.S. Army study found the incidence of mental health problems climbed significantly for troops returning for third or fourth tours.
It found that among noncommissioned officers, 27 percent on their third and fourth tours suffered mental health problems last year, compared with 18.5 percent on their second tours and 12 percent on their first tours.
Guard officials say it's not clear whether that translates to Guard soldiers, given that many aren't in direct combat roles, but they are working in general to meet mental health needs of returning soldiers.
James Barber, coordinator of the family assistance center, said post-traumatic stress, divorce, and difficulty reintegrating are among the more frequent concerns among returning Guardsmen. Spouses said they struggle to learn new roles such as paying bills or fixing the car, and then struggle to readjust again when the Guardsman returns.
Yvonne Draper, Bill Draper's wife, agreed it can be difficult.
"We've lived alone, got our own schedules, and they pop back in to our lives," she said "He's been in a war zone, and everything's changed for both of us. It takes a very strong marriage."
Digging a 'way back in'
Lt. Col. David Mounkes, a member of the Kentucky Air Guard, was recently at the Louisville International Airport to help welcome a fellow unit member back. Kevin Thornberry, a logistics manager for Toyota, returned after six months coordinating logistics and emergency resupplies for Special Forces troops in Afghanistan.
His wife, Deidre, said his absence meant she had to take a night shift at a Cincinnati Hospital to ensure she could get their kids to activities, while her mother took a voluntary furlough from her job to help. Neighbors cooked her food, and one of her husband's Toyota co-workers helped her with the yard.
"If going once gives an active-duty soldier a break, then I wanted to help," Kevin Thornberry said of his deployment.
But he recognizes that his own home life suffered.
"My place at home is gone," Thornberry admitted. "I'm going to have to dig my way back in."
What the next few years will bring for Guard members is not clear.
The National Military Families Association says the planned drawdown in Iraq, at least so far, is being offset by a ramping up in Afghanistan, and that Guard members shouldn't expect the demand for their service to go away anytime soon.
Meanwhile, Kentucky Gov. Steve Beshear said recently that despite the sacrifices asked of them in recent years, "we take great pride in how our citizen-soldiers and airmen have answered the call of duty."
Alexandra Gonzalez-Waddington is an Augusta GA divorce lawyer & Georgia Military Divorce Lawyer Augusta Georgia domestic mediator. She is an Augusta military divorce lawyer, GA child custody attorney , and Augusta Georgia child support attorney. She offers mediation for divorce, child custody, and child support.
Repeated military missions causing strife in civilian life
By Chris Kenning
When Thomas Leonard joined the Kentucky National Guard in the 1980s, he considered it a part-time job to help pay the bills through college — a commitment of one weekend a month, two weeks a year. Being sent to war barely crossed his mind.
But since 2003, the 46-year-old Louisville medical worker has been deployed overseas twice — once to Iraq, once to Afghanistan — weathering mortar and small-arms attack, nearly two years of absences and jarring returns to civilian life.
"My daughter and sons grew so fast that I remembered them as young children, yet when I came home they were teenagers," he said.
Similar stories are being told across Kentucky, Indiana and the nation, as the fight against terrorism and two wars overseas have radically redefined what it means to be a citizen solider. The Guard is being called up in numbers not seen since World War II, at one point in 2005 making up half the Army's combat force in Iraq.
In Kentucky, 4,170 of the state's 7,208 Army National Guard members were deployed to Afghanistan, Iraq or Guantanamo Bay for up to a year between Sept. 11, 2001, and October 2008. Another 1,005 have been on two deployments — 168 have found themselves on three and even four deployments.
The state's National Air Guard has made 3,558 total deployments since 2001.
The Indiana Guard, meanwhile, has deployed 9,800 Army soldiers and 3,000 Air National Guard members in the War on Terror, according to a June report sent to Gov. Mitch Daniels.
"This is a totally different Guard than it used to be," said David Altom, a spokesman for the Kentucky Guard. "But it's a product of its time."
Col. Phil Miller, the Kentucky Guard's chief of staff, said the deployments and their stresses haven't hampered recruiting, which has exceeded goals for five straight years. Nor has it restricted its ability to respond to state crises, such as the ice storm that hit Kentucky in January, which mobilized 4,100 soldiers for door-to-door checks, he said.
But officials, chaplains, soldiers and families say the extended deployments are straining marriages, families and careers.
There is a "trickle-down effect on families," said Chaplain Bill Draper, himself deployed twice since 2006 to Afghanistan.
And some vets, struggling with combat and post-traumatic stress, face difficult returns to a civilian world largely detached from the wars.
"The most difficult time is the transition. It's when we get back and have to retrain ourselves to function in the civilian environment, especially for reservists," said Staff Sgt. Les Newport, an Indiana National Guard spokesman.
"The hardest part was adjusting to the tempo. I was used to 'go go go,' and suddenly, we're in first gear again," agreed Leonard, who returned to his job as a nurse at the Louisville Veterans' Affairs Medical Center after his last tour. "You hear a bang, and you're more alert."
The double impact
Julie Rice, 36, of Louisville, whose physician's assistant husband left last October with the 1163rd medical group to care for detainees near Baghdad, knows first-hand the impact that multiple deployments can have on families.
This is Michael Rice's second — his first was in Afghanistan in 2004, shortly after they got married.
During this second absence, Julie has given birth to twins, and without family in town, she had to drive herself to the hospital. Now, she's juggling a full-time job and two infants while her husband misses a formative year of their children's life, she said. After two, nearly year-long absences, she's wondering what his homecoming will bring later this year.
"It's not what I expected," she said. "My idea was the Guard stays home and the normal military goes overseas."
Army Guard members typically have at least three years between deployments, unless they volunteer to fill a needed slot, officials said. Most deployments last about a year, although that can be shorter depending on the mission. Air Guard members often do much shorter missions — as short as a week, for example, but as long as months at a time.
Nationally, out of a total Guard force of more than 350,000, about a fourth are deployed overseas in every conceivable job: As military police, medics, prison guards, chaplains, public-information officers, pilots, mine-clearing engineers and combat soldiers.
In some recent years, 1,500 Kentucky Guard members on average were deployed overseas at any given time. That figure has declined to about 500 this year, but as the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan continue, the number of Guardsmen seeing their second or third tours are increasing, especially among those trained in military policing and other "force protection" tasks, such as guarding convoys, officials said.
The debate over the Guard's role has spawned a "Bring the Guard Home" movement, backed by a collection of veterans and peace groups, which have unsuccessfully pushed for legislation in 13 other states aimed at limiting overseas deployments. A Maryland legislator earlier this year introduced a bill to prohibit deployments unless Congress declared war, saying overuse had weakened the Guard's readiness.
"When the war first started, the Guard was never expected to pull the missions they have, and I don't think a lot of families were prepared," said Michelle Joyner, of the Washington, D.C.-based National Military Families Association.
But Guard officials cite a history of serving both state and federal needs. A descendant of the Colonial Militia, the Guard played key roles in World War I and World War II. After Vietnam, when leaders avoided mobilizing them for what historians say were political reasons, many came to view it strictly as a domestic force.
Trying to bridge the gaps
Since 2003, the Kentucky Guard has boosted programs to help soldiers and families, including offering marriage counseling and retreats, and summer camps for kids; expanding a family assistance center from two employees to 30; and creating a Yellow Ribbon program for returning soldiers that addresses suicide prevention, post-traumatic stress, VA benefits, job rights and other help.
Multiple deployments present "a challenge, no question about it," said Indiana's Newport. "Not only is it a challenge for the soldier and his family, but his employer."
There are laws to protect Guard member's jobs while they're serving. The federal Uniformed Services Employment and Reemployment Rights Act requires employers to hold jobs for Guard members called up for duty. However, it does not protect them if a factory closes, for example, or if a division is eliminated within a company.
Officials said that's happened in Kentucky only in rare cases, and usually only with smaller companies, such as a three-employee plumbing contractor forced by the poor economy to make cuts.
But there are other stresses. Last year, a U.S. Army study found the incidence of mental health problems climbed significantly for troops returning for third or fourth tours.
It found that among noncommissioned officers, 27 percent on their third and fourth tours suffered mental health problems last year, compared with 18.5 percent on their second tours and 12 percent on their first tours.
Guard officials say it's not clear whether that translates to Guard soldiers, given that many aren't in direct combat roles, but they are working in general to meet mental health needs of returning soldiers.
James Barber, coordinator of the family assistance center, said post-traumatic stress, divorce, and difficulty reintegrating are among the more frequent concerns among returning Guardsmen. Spouses said they struggle to learn new roles such as paying bills or fixing the car, and then struggle to readjust again when the Guardsman returns.
Yvonne Draper, Bill Draper's wife, agreed it can be difficult.
"We've lived alone, got our own schedules, and they pop back in to our lives," she said "He's been in a war zone, and everything's changed for both of us. It takes a very strong marriage."
Digging a 'way back in'
Lt. Col. David Mounkes, a member of the Kentucky Air Guard, was recently at the Louisville International Airport to help welcome a fellow unit member back. Kevin Thornberry, a logistics manager for Toyota, returned after six months coordinating logistics and emergency resupplies for Special Forces troops in Afghanistan.
His wife, Deidre, said his absence meant she had to take a night shift at a Cincinnati Hospital to ensure she could get their kids to activities, while her mother took a voluntary furlough from her job to help. Neighbors cooked her food, and one of her husband's Toyota co-workers helped her with the yard.
"If going once gives an active-duty soldier a break, then I wanted to help," Kevin Thornberry said of his deployment.
But he recognizes that his own home life suffered.
"My place at home is gone," Thornberry admitted. "I'm going to have to dig my way back in."
What the next few years will bring for Guard members is not clear.
The National Military Families Association says the planned drawdown in Iraq, at least so far, is being offset by a ramping up in Afghanistan, and that Guard members shouldn't expect the demand for their service to go away anytime soon.
Meanwhile, Kentucky Gov. Steve Beshear said recently that despite the sacrifices asked of them in recent years, "we take great pride in how our citizen-soldiers and airmen have answered the call of duty."
Alexandra Gonzalez-Waddington is an Augusta GA divorce lawyer & Georgia Military Divorce Lawyer Augusta Georgia domestic mediator. She is an Augusta military divorce lawyer, GA child custody attorney , and Augusta Georgia child support attorney. She offers mediation for divorce, child custody, and child support.
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