Augusta Military Divorce Lawyer - State-mandated divorce counseling would be too little, too late for most
How's your marriage?
No, seriously, because if you're not feeling the love, a man from Pampa wants to help you. More specifically, he wants the government to help you.
The man is state Rep. Warren Chisum, R-Pampa, the government is the state of Texas, and the "help" is a particularly officious brand of interference in your private affairs.
He had introduced legislation mandating that if you have kids and you want a divorce, you won't get it until you sit through 10 probably fruitless and possibly embarrassing hours of state-approved marriage counseling.
Disclaimer: I'm not an anti-government crank. And I'm a great believer in the institution of marriage, being a contented denizen of that blessed state. I have firsthand experience of the misery and trauma that divorce engenders.
No question that many of us are too quick to make major life decisions – marriage, parenthood, divorce – on impulse, or without realistic expectations. Ours would be a more stable society if everyone afforded these decisions the gravity and respect they're due.
Chisum has already tackled the issue from the front end. He authored a law that took effect last September giving engaged couples a price break on the marriage license if they underwent state-approved counseling before the Big Day.
Absurdly named "Twogether in Texas," the program hasn't exactly caught fire. In February, the Fort Worth Star-Telegram reported during its first five months, only 602 couples statewide had taken advantage of the deal.
But at least you can opt out of that one for a few bucks. The new counseling bill, with narrow exclusions for those who can prove they have been victims of abuse, would apply to every married person with children who petitions the court for a divorce.
No class, no split. The nonpetitioning spouse doesn't have to take the class – but if he or she does not, the judge can weigh that lapse when doling out property or even custody of the kids.
Look, I have nothing against counseling, a noble resource which helps a lot of people in desperate need. I think judges should have the option of ordering counseling as a condition of divorce, if they see fit in individual cases.
And I think programs that help divorcing parents minimize the stress on their children are all to the good.
But Chisum makes no bones about the fact that his idea of counseling isn't to make divorce more civilized – it's to talk you out of it.
"The deal is, we need to take marriage more seriously," he told the Austin American-Statesman last summer. "If this just saves one marriage, it'll be fine with me."
Well, not you gay couples. You don't have to worry about divorce counseling, because this same lawmaker was behind the state amendment that makes it illegal for you to get married in the first place.
As for the rest of us, though, a lot of veterans of the divorce wars will tell you that once somebody already wants out, it's too late for 10 hours of earnest training in "conflict management" and "forgiveness skills" to rekindle those refrigerated embers.
Worst of all, though, is the awful, one-size-fits-all assumption that the same "skills" workshop is the fix that every troubled marriage needs.
In Chisum's cheery view, everybody's just like him and his neighbors and his church friends back home in Pampa.
He seems to think a government handout and maybe a (shudder) sharing session with a roomful of unhappy strangers can address the most complex issues of human relationships – kind of like a licensing exam for morticians or a class in boat safety. There's an eerie mix of impersonal regimentation and deeply personal intrusion about the whole thing.
Chisum is right about one thing: We, as a culture, need to take marriage more seriously.
But making people fidget through government divorce school won't make it happen.
Alexandra Gonzalez-Waddington is an Augusta GA divorce lawyer & Georgia Military Divorce Lawyer Augusta Georgia domestic mediator. She is an Augusta military divorce lawyer, GA child custody attorney , and Augusta Georgia child support attorney. She offers mediation for divorce, child custody, and child support.
Georgia Military Divorce Lawyer - VFW strengthening veterans’ families during, after deployment
Georgia Military Divorce Lawyer - VFW strengthening veterans’ families during, after deployment
The United States is in its eighth year of war and there are hundreds of thousands of new war veterans, many of whom have multiple deployments behind them.
America is now learning what that means in human terms, according to a press release from the VFW National Home for Children, and the statistics are startling.
• More than 4,800 have died, many leaving behind spouses and children.
• More than 33,000 have been wounded, many severely enough to end their military service.
• The divorce rate within military families is increasing, with more than 25,000 divorces last year alone.
• Alcohol consumption is on the increase, particularly in the Reserve and National Guard community.
• A Military Family Research Institute survey found that 56 percent of enlisted service members report difficulty with their finances, and 47 percent say they are in “over their head” with their expenses. Veterans are trying to transition back to civilian life and some are having difficulty.
The Department of Veteran Affairs (VA) has increased efforts, improved quality of service and developed new programs and methods of outreach to veterans. Americans have shown they are willing to help and many new non-profit organizations have sprung up to fill the gaps. Unfortunately, all these efforts can be overwhelming and confusing for the new, young veteran, making it difficult for them to get the help they need.
The Veterans of Foreign Wars is reaching out to these new veterans with friendship and a helping hand from someone who has been there. Connections are being made across wars and across generations.
The VFW, like other Veteran Service Organizations, has Veteran Service officers to help veterans navigate the myriad of options and programs that are available to them. Programs like Unmet Needs or the Military Assistance Program can help with short term or specific needs for veterans and their families.
When the need is much greater, the VFW National Home for Children is there to help with a home and extensive support.
while the family gets back on its feet. Wounded veterans in a VA Vocational Rehabilitation Program are served at the National Home with their family while they go to school or get training to learn new job skills. Beyond just a house, the National Home offers:
• specialized counseling;
• financial management classes;
• daycare services for parents attending school and training programs;
• life skills education;
• support for children adjusting to family changes and recovering from the stress of a parent at war;
• activities to connect with other families in similar situations;
• a connection with veterans who have experienced war overseas.
Children of deployed military are also welcomed at the National Home. Each member of the military establishes a “family plan,” designating who will care for their children during deployment. Sometimes those plans fail. When that happens, the children can find refuge at the National Home and get the love and support they need until mom or dad comes home. The parent stays connected to the children through phone calls, e-mail, letters and care packages throughout the deployment. Children attend school, receive help with homework, learn and play with other children and get the emotional support they need to help them continue as normal a life as possible in such an extreme situation.
Sometimes, it’s a military spouse and children that need refuge during deployment. These families can live safe and supported lives at the National Home. The spouse may go to school or get job training, take financial classes, get counseling and learn other important life skills that can help them become stronger and more independent families when their deployed loved one returns.
The reasons families come to the VFW National Home for Children vary greatly. The love and support they receive to help them achieve goals is consistent. Each family comes to the National Home to work toward goals and has a plan to leave once they have reached key milestones. When they leave, they are stronger and more independent families with new friends in the VFW who have made an important difference in their lives.
The VFW makes a difference in the lives of veterans or military families every day, with the hand of friendship and an offer of help. The VFW National Home for Children is a shining example of that friendship and generosity of spirit.
Alexandra Gonzalez-Waddington is an Augusta GA divorce lawyer & Georgia Military Divorce Lawyer Augusta Georgia domestic mediator. She is an Augusta military divorce lawyer, GA child custody attorney , and Augusta Georgia child support attorney. She offers mediation for divorce, child custody, and child support.
The United States is in its eighth year of war and there are hundreds of thousands of new war veterans, many of whom have multiple deployments behind them.
America is now learning what that means in human terms, according to a press release from the VFW National Home for Children, and the statistics are startling.
• More than 4,800 have died, many leaving behind spouses and children.
• More than 33,000 have been wounded, many severely enough to end their military service.
• The divorce rate within military families is increasing, with more than 25,000 divorces last year alone.
• Alcohol consumption is on the increase, particularly in the Reserve and National Guard community.
• A Military Family Research Institute survey found that 56 percent of enlisted service members report difficulty with their finances, and 47 percent say they are in “over their head” with their expenses. Veterans are trying to transition back to civilian life and some are having difficulty.
The Department of Veteran Affairs (VA) has increased efforts, improved quality of service and developed new programs and methods of outreach to veterans. Americans have shown they are willing to help and many new non-profit organizations have sprung up to fill the gaps. Unfortunately, all these efforts can be overwhelming and confusing for the new, young veteran, making it difficult for them to get the help they need.
The Veterans of Foreign Wars is reaching out to these new veterans with friendship and a helping hand from someone who has been there. Connections are being made across wars and across generations.
The VFW, like other Veteran Service Organizations, has Veteran Service officers to help veterans navigate the myriad of options and programs that are available to them. Programs like Unmet Needs or the Military Assistance Program can help with short term or specific needs for veterans and their families.
When the need is much greater, the VFW National Home for Children is there to help with a home and extensive support.
while the family gets back on its feet. Wounded veterans in a VA Vocational Rehabilitation Program are served at the National Home with their family while they go to school or get training to learn new job skills. Beyond just a house, the National Home offers:
• specialized counseling;
• financial management classes;
• daycare services for parents attending school and training programs;
• life skills education;
• support for children adjusting to family changes and recovering from the stress of a parent at war;
• activities to connect with other families in similar situations;
• a connection with veterans who have experienced war overseas.
Children of deployed military are also welcomed at the National Home. Each member of the military establishes a “family plan,” designating who will care for their children during deployment. Sometimes those plans fail. When that happens, the children can find refuge at the National Home and get the love and support they need until mom or dad comes home. The parent stays connected to the children through phone calls, e-mail, letters and care packages throughout the deployment. Children attend school, receive help with homework, learn and play with other children and get the emotional support they need to help them continue as normal a life as possible in such an extreme situation.
Sometimes, it’s a military spouse and children that need refuge during deployment. These families can live safe and supported lives at the National Home. The spouse may go to school or get job training, take financial classes, get counseling and learn other important life skills that can help them become stronger and more independent families when their deployed loved one returns.
The reasons families come to the VFW National Home for Children vary greatly. The love and support they receive to help them achieve goals is consistent. Each family comes to the National Home to work toward goals and has a plan to leave once they have reached key milestones. When they leave, they are stronger and more independent families with new friends in the VFW who have made an important difference in their lives.
The VFW makes a difference in the lives of veterans or military families every day, with the hand of friendship and an offer of help. The VFW National Home for Children is a shining example of that friendship and generosity of spirit.
Alexandra Gonzalez-Waddington is an Augusta GA divorce lawyer & Georgia Military Divorce Lawyer Augusta Georgia domestic mediator. She is an Augusta military divorce lawyer, GA child custody attorney , and Augusta Georgia child support attorney. She offers mediation for divorce, child custody, and child support.
Augusta Military Divorce Attorney - JOURNEY TO IRAQ: A Soldier's baptism
Augusta Military Divorce Attorney - JOURNEY TO IRAQ: A Soldier's baptism
By Carol Pipes
BAGHDAD, Iraq (BP)--There's strong and then there's Army strong. Nowhere is that more evident than on the front lines of war. My experience embedding with the chaplains of the XVIII Airborne Corps solidified my belief that we have the best of the best serving overseas.
After three full days in Baghdad's International Zone, we made our way by midnight Rhino convoy run to Camp Victory. Camp Victory is the primary component of the Victory Base Complex (VBC), which occupies the area surrounding the Baghdad International Airport (BIAP). VBC encompasses the former Al Radwaniyah Presidential Complex and contains several manmade lakes, the Ba'ath Party House, the Victory Over Iran and Victory over America Palaces, dozens of smaller mansions for Ba'ath Party officials and Al Faw Palace, which currently serves as the headquarters for the Multi-National Corps Iraq (MNC-I).
VBC has most of the amenities of a stateside base -- electricity, sewer system, potable water, Internet, communications. It's like a small city, complete with its own hospital, fire department, police force, water purification plant and multiple chapels. It even has a coffee shop, Pizza Hut and Burger King.
The sand-colored buildings, once inhabited by Saddam Hussein's family and Ba'ath Party officials, blend in with the landscape. The most notable building is Al Faw Palace, Saddam's former retreat center and one of 99 palaces built by the former dictator. Al Faw is a curious blend of marble, tile, gold trim and massive chandeliers, all surrounded by a cerulean lake and golden sand.
The half-million-square-foot palace -- 62 rooms and 29 baths -- was a playground for Saddam's sons, Uday and Qusay. Standing on one of the private balconies, you can almost imagine them fishing or water skiing on the lake below. (Note: Saddam's land o' lakes was hidden behind a wall encircling the compound. It wasn't until U.S. liberating forces swept in that Iraqi famers, not 10 yards on the other side of the wall, realized how Saddam had squandered so much water, forcing them to eke out an existence from the dry ground.)
Walking up the circular, marble staircase, I feel like an Arabian version of Scarlett O'Hara. Tara has nothing on this palace. Or maybe it does. Upon close inspection, not all that glitters is gold. Much of the décor in the palace is fake, including the massive chandelier hanging in the foyer -- it's mostly plastic and gold-painted tin. Saddam's titanic palaces matched his ego and mimicked his reign -- they both lacked substance.
The U.S. military is making good use of the palace, transforming it into office space that serves as headquarters for Mulitnational Force Iraq and all operational aspects of Operation Iraqi Freedom.
The area has a dusty, pale beauty. Palm tree-lined lakes make it easy to forget you're in a combat zone. But the constant whop, whop, whop of Black Hawk helicopters and the occasional mortar round sent over the wire by the enemy serve as a reminder to our troops of why they're here.
"Sometimes you can get lulled into a false sense of security," one soldier told me. "But we're in a combat zone and the enemy doesn't sleep. So the Army doesn't sleep."
My temporary home was a trailer beside one of Saddam's manmade lakes. The first few nights on base, I slept lightly, listening for air raid warnings and mortar rounds that never came. I'd been warned about what to do in case the enemy decided to flex their muscles -- hit the ground or look for the nearest bunker. Fortunately, I never had to exercise those precautions. Once we hit our battle rhythm, though, I slept hard and sound.
Truth is, it was easy to forget we were in a combat zone, especially being at Victory. It was almost like being at camp, except that these campers carried guns and the food was better. The dining facility served everything from turkey and dressing to surf and turf. I ate a different flavor of hand-dipped ice cream almost every day. (Everyone said I'd come back 10 pounds lighter. No such luck.)
The expansive buffer between us and the Red Zone served as a protective womb. A soldier asked us one day if we'd heard explosions the night before. What? You're kidding? He wasn't. The enemy had sent over a couple of mortar rounds in the night. And I'd slept right through it.
At first, I felt like an interloper, camera hanging from my neck, pen and paper always in hand. But all the troops I encountered were friendly and happy to answer my endless barrage of questions. When I offered my thanks for their service and sacrifice, I almost always got the same response: "Just doin' my job, ma'am. Just doin' my job."
We have an amazing group of men and women who have volunteered to leave their families behind for a year or more and selflessly put themselves in harm's way. Americans have short attention spans, and as the economy tops the headlines we would do well not to forget that there are still 140,000 of our sons and daughters in Iraq. And they are doing everything they can every day to make sure those of us back home are safe.
Their work is long and tedious, and success is definitely a process. But for the most part, troops are positive about the progress being made in Iraq. Life is returning somewhat back to normal, whatever that is. Children are going back to school -- schools built by U.S. troops. Iraqi soldiers, trained by U.S. soldiers, are taking on more responsibilities. And Iraqis are once again governing themselves.
Every day on base was filled with new experiences and hearing the stories of our Southern Baptist chaplains who are serving God and country. They carry no guns, yet U.S. military chaplains are considered combat multipliers. The Army recognizes its soldiers as spiritual beings, and chaplains provide care for them particularly in places where the spirit gets weary from the fight. But spiritual care goes beyond religion. No matter a soldier's faith background, the chaplain is chaplain to all.
From counseling the young soldier whose wife just filed for divorce to being a leveling moral presence among troops trained to fight and kill, chaplains play a significant role in the success of combat operations.
Part of the chaplain's job is to go where the soldiers go to make sure their spiritual needs are met. Being present with the troops where they work and where they live is essential to serving them and meeting their needs. It's a chaplain's duty to strengthen soldiers for another day in the combat zone, to pray for them and bring comfort and hope when faced with death.
The key to being effective, chaplains say, is building relationships. As clergy in a secular institution, chaplains are not allowed to impose their religious views on others. But most would say that proselytizing would hinder developing close relationships with soldiers, and that's where the real ministry takes place. So, chaplains continue to walk a church-state tightrope, leaving their preaching to the chapel services and allowing the cross on their uniform to speak volumes. There's power in that tiny stitched cross. It opens doors to conversations with soldiers who need a listening ear. Much of a chaplain's ministry occurs one-on-one in the chow hall, down at the motor pool, in the gym or standing in line at the PX.
A thick cloud of dust blocks the sun as our small convoy of SUVs bumps along the road to Camp Liberty. It's a big day for Army Chaplain (Maj.) Mark Frederick and Navy Lt. Comdr. Nicole Battaglia. Their mission: to baptize Lt. Comdr. Battaglia. It's mid-morning and the temperature is only in the mid-60s. The water in the baptistery is bound to be cold. But that's not stopping these two. Battaglia knows it's time to follow up her commitment to Christ by being baptized. Her only regret: "I wish my mom were here to see me do this. She was so excited when I told her."
For chaplains like Frederick, this is what chaplaincy is all about -- bringing God to the soldiers and soldiers to God.
Alexandra Gonzalez-Waddington is an Augusta GA divorce lawyer & Georgia Military Divorce Lawyer Augusta Georgia domestic mediator. She is an Augusta military divorce lawyer, GA child custody attorney , and Augusta Georgia child support attorney. She offers mediation for divorce, child custody, and child support.
By Carol Pipes
BAGHDAD, Iraq (BP)--There's strong and then there's Army strong. Nowhere is that more evident than on the front lines of war. My experience embedding with the chaplains of the XVIII Airborne Corps solidified my belief that we have the best of the best serving overseas.
After three full days in Baghdad's International Zone, we made our way by midnight Rhino convoy run to Camp Victory. Camp Victory is the primary component of the Victory Base Complex (VBC), which occupies the area surrounding the Baghdad International Airport (BIAP). VBC encompasses the former Al Radwaniyah Presidential Complex and contains several manmade lakes, the Ba'ath Party House, the Victory Over Iran and Victory over America Palaces, dozens of smaller mansions for Ba'ath Party officials and Al Faw Palace, which currently serves as the headquarters for the Multi-National Corps Iraq (MNC-I).
VBC has most of the amenities of a stateside base -- electricity, sewer system, potable water, Internet, communications. It's like a small city, complete with its own hospital, fire department, police force, water purification plant and multiple chapels. It even has a coffee shop, Pizza Hut and Burger King.
The sand-colored buildings, once inhabited by Saddam Hussein's family and Ba'ath Party officials, blend in with the landscape. The most notable building is Al Faw Palace, Saddam's former retreat center and one of 99 palaces built by the former dictator. Al Faw is a curious blend of marble, tile, gold trim and massive chandeliers, all surrounded by a cerulean lake and golden sand.
The half-million-square-foot palace -- 62 rooms and 29 baths -- was a playground for Saddam's sons, Uday and Qusay. Standing on one of the private balconies, you can almost imagine them fishing or water skiing on the lake below. (Note: Saddam's land o' lakes was hidden behind a wall encircling the compound. It wasn't until U.S. liberating forces swept in that Iraqi famers, not 10 yards on the other side of the wall, realized how Saddam had squandered so much water, forcing them to eke out an existence from the dry ground.)
Walking up the circular, marble staircase, I feel like an Arabian version of Scarlett O'Hara. Tara has nothing on this palace. Or maybe it does. Upon close inspection, not all that glitters is gold. Much of the décor in the palace is fake, including the massive chandelier hanging in the foyer -- it's mostly plastic and gold-painted tin. Saddam's titanic palaces matched his ego and mimicked his reign -- they both lacked substance.
The U.S. military is making good use of the palace, transforming it into office space that serves as headquarters for Mulitnational Force Iraq and all operational aspects of Operation Iraqi Freedom.
The area has a dusty, pale beauty. Palm tree-lined lakes make it easy to forget you're in a combat zone. But the constant whop, whop, whop of Black Hawk helicopters and the occasional mortar round sent over the wire by the enemy serve as a reminder to our troops of why they're here.
"Sometimes you can get lulled into a false sense of security," one soldier told me. "But we're in a combat zone and the enemy doesn't sleep. So the Army doesn't sleep."
My temporary home was a trailer beside one of Saddam's manmade lakes. The first few nights on base, I slept lightly, listening for air raid warnings and mortar rounds that never came. I'd been warned about what to do in case the enemy decided to flex their muscles -- hit the ground or look for the nearest bunker. Fortunately, I never had to exercise those precautions. Once we hit our battle rhythm, though, I slept hard and sound.
Truth is, it was easy to forget we were in a combat zone, especially being at Victory. It was almost like being at camp, except that these campers carried guns and the food was better. The dining facility served everything from turkey and dressing to surf and turf. I ate a different flavor of hand-dipped ice cream almost every day. (Everyone said I'd come back 10 pounds lighter. No such luck.)
The expansive buffer between us and the Red Zone served as a protective womb. A soldier asked us one day if we'd heard explosions the night before. What? You're kidding? He wasn't. The enemy had sent over a couple of mortar rounds in the night. And I'd slept right through it.
At first, I felt like an interloper, camera hanging from my neck, pen and paper always in hand. But all the troops I encountered were friendly and happy to answer my endless barrage of questions. When I offered my thanks for their service and sacrifice, I almost always got the same response: "Just doin' my job, ma'am. Just doin' my job."
We have an amazing group of men and women who have volunteered to leave their families behind for a year or more and selflessly put themselves in harm's way. Americans have short attention spans, and as the economy tops the headlines we would do well not to forget that there are still 140,000 of our sons and daughters in Iraq. And they are doing everything they can every day to make sure those of us back home are safe.
Their work is long and tedious, and success is definitely a process. But for the most part, troops are positive about the progress being made in Iraq. Life is returning somewhat back to normal, whatever that is. Children are going back to school -- schools built by U.S. troops. Iraqi soldiers, trained by U.S. soldiers, are taking on more responsibilities. And Iraqis are once again governing themselves.
Every day on base was filled with new experiences and hearing the stories of our Southern Baptist chaplains who are serving God and country. They carry no guns, yet U.S. military chaplains are considered combat multipliers. The Army recognizes its soldiers as spiritual beings, and chaplains provide care for them particularly in places where the spirit gets weary from the fight. But spiritual care goes beyond religion. No matter a soldier's faith background, the chaplain is chaplain to all.
From counseling the young soldier whose wife just filed for divorce to being a leveling moral presence among troops trained to fight and kill, chaplains play a significant role in the success of combat operations.
Part of the chaplain's job is to go where the soldiers go to make sure their spiritual needs are met. Being present with the troops where they work and where they live is essential to serving them and meeting their needs. It's a chaplain's duty to strengthen soldiers for another day in the combat zone, to pray for them and bring comfort and hope when faced with death.
The key to being effective, chaplains say, is building relationships. As clergy in a secular institution, chaplains are not allowed to impose their religious views on others. But most would say that proselytizing would hinder developing close relationships with soldiers, and that's where the real ministry takes place. So, chaplains continue to walk a church-state tightrope, leaving their preaching to the chapel services and allowing the cross on their uniform to speak volumes. There's power in that tiny stitched cross. It opens doors to conversations with soldiers who need a listening ear. Much of a chaplain's ministry occurs one-on-one in the chow hall, down at the motor pool, in the gym or standing in line at the PX.
A thick cloud of dust blocks the sun as our small convoy of SUVs bumps along the road to Camp Liberty. It's a big day for Army Chaplain (Maj.) Mark Frederick and Navy Lt. Comdr. Nicole Battaglia. Their mission: to baptize Lt. Comdr. Battaglia. It's mid-morning and the temperature is only in the mid-60s. The water in the baptistery is bound to be cold. But that's not stopping these two. Battaglia knows it's time to follow up her commitment to Christ by being baptized. Her only regret: "I wish my mom were here to see me do this. She was so excited when I told her."
For chaplains like Frederick, this is what chaplaincy is all about -- bringing God to the soldiers and soldiers to God.
Alexandra Gonzalez-Waddington is an Augusta GA divorce lawyer & Georgia Military Divorce Lawyer Augusta Georgia domestic mediator. She is an Augusta military divorce lawyer, GA child custody attorney , and Augusta Georgia child support attorney. She offers mediation for divorce, child custody, and child support.
Augusta Military Divorce Lawyer - State officials creating plan to help those with traumatic brain injuries
Augusta Military Divorce Lawyer - State officials creating plan to help those with traumatic brain injuries
By Christine Thomasos - DEMOCRAT WRITER
Unemployment, incarceration and divorce can all be experienced by those suffering from traumatic brain injury.
To address this, the state Department of Health recently developed a five-year plan to help people suffering from these and other problems resulting from TBI.
The plan was created as a way to enhance the traumatic brain injury system of care currently in existence and to increase advocacy, education and funding.
Valerie Breen, executive director for the Brain Injury Association of Florida, said the number will increase nationwide when people in the military return from Iraq.
"Over 60,000 soldiers are returning with TBI, so there's going to be a significant gap between the growth of TBI and the professionals and organizations prepared to serve this population," Breen said. More than 8,000 Floridians will suffer from traumatic brain injury this year, which can be caused by any injury to the head, state health officials say.
Thom DeLilla, bureau chief of the Florida Department of Health Brain and Spinal Cord Injury Program, said a lack of knowledge about the injury is another important issue that needs to be solved by the five-year plan.
"Generally most people are not aware of TBI, the consequences of brain injury or resources available throughout the state," DeLilla said.
Alexandra Gonzalez-Waddington is an Augusta GA divorce lawyer & Georgia Military Divorce Lawyer Augusta Georgia domestic mediator. She is an Augusta military divorce lawyer, GA child custody attorney , and Augusta Georgia child support attorney. She offers mediation for divorce, child custody, and child support.
By Christine Thomasos - DEMOCRAT WRITER
Unemployment, incarceration and divorce can all be experienced by those suffering from traumatic brain injury.
To address this, the state Department of Health recently developed a five-year plan to help people suffering from these and other problems resulting from TBI.
The plan was created as a way to enhance the traumatic brain injury system of care currently in existence and to increase advocacy, education and funding.
Valerie Breen, executive director for the Brain Injury Association of Florida, said the number will increase nationwide when people in the military return from Iraq.
"Over 60,000 soldiers are returning with TBI, so there's going to be a significant gap between the growth of TBI and the professionals and organizations prepared to serve this population," Breen said. More than 8,000 Floridians will suffer from traumatic brain injury this year, which can be caused by any injury to the head, state health officials say.
Thom DeLilla, bureau chief of the Florida Department of Health Brain and Spinal Cord Injury Program, said a lack of knowledge about the injury is another important issue that needs to be solved by the five-year plan.
"Generally most people are not aware of TBI, the consequences of brain injury or resources available throughout the state," DeLilla said.
Alexandra Gonzalez-Waddington is an Augusta GA divorce lawyer & Georgia Military Divorce Lawyer Augusta Georgia domestic mediator. She is an Augusta military divorce lawyer, GA child custody attorney , and Augusta Georgia child support attorney. She offers mediation for divorce, child custody, and child support.
Augusta Military Divorce Attorney - Death on the Home Front
Augusta Military Divorce Attorney - Death on the Home Front - Women in the crosshairs
by Ann Jones
Wake up, America. The boys are coming home, and they’re not the boys who went away.
On New Year’s Day, the New York Times welcomed the advent of 2009 by reporting that, since returning from Iraq, nine members of the Fort Carson, Colo., Fourth Brigade Combat team had been charged with homicide. Five of the murders they were responsible for took place in 2008 when, in addition, “charges of domestic violence, rape, and sexual assault” at the base rose sharply. Some of the murder victims were chosen at random; four were fellow soldiers – all men. Three were wives or girlfriends.
This shouldn’t be a surprise. Men sent to Iraq or Afghanistan for two, three, or four tours of duty return to wives who find them “changed” and children they barely know. Tens of thousands return to inadequate, underfunded veterans’ services with appalling physical injuries, crippling post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), and suck-it-up sergeants who hold to the belief that no good soldier seeks help. That, by the way, is a mighty convenient belief for the Departments of Defense and Veterans Affairs, which have been notoriously slow to offer much of that help.
Recently, Republican Sen. John Cornyn from Texas, a state with 15 major military bases, noted that as many as one in five U.S. veterans is expected to suffer from at least one “invisible wound” of war, if not a combination of them, “including depression, post-traumatic stress disorder, and mild traumatic brain injury.” Left untreated, such wounds can become very visible: witness, for example, the recent wave of suicides that have swept through the military, at least 128 in 2008, and 24 in January 2009 alone.
To judge by past wars, a lot of returning veterans will do themselves a lot of damage drinking and drugging. Many will wind up in prison for drug use or criminal offenses that might have been minor if the offenders hadn’t been carrying guns they learned to rely on in the service. And a shocking number of those veterans will bring the violence of war home to their wives and children.
That’s no accident. The U.S. military is a macho club, proud of its long tradition of misogyny, and not about to give it up. One decorated veteran of the first Gulf War, who credited the army with teaching him to repress his emotions, described his basic training as “long, exhausting marches” and “sound-offs [that] revolved around killing and mutilating the enemy or violent sex with women.” (The two themes easily merge.) That veteran was Timothy McVeigh, the unrepentant Oklahoma City bomber, who must have known that blowing up a government office building during business hours was sure to kill a whole lot of women.
Even in the best of times, the incidence of violence against women is much higher in the military than among civilians. After war, it’s naturally worse – as with those combat team members at Fort Carson. In 2005, one of them, Pfc. Stephen Sherwood, returned from Iraq and fatally shot his wife, then himself. In September 2008, Pvt. John Needham, who received a medical discharge after a failed suicide attempt, beat his girlfriend to death. In October 2008, Spc. Robert H. Marko raped and murdered Judilianna Lawrence, a developmentally disabled teenager he met online.
These murders of wives and girlfriends – crimes the Bureau of Justice Statistics labels “intimate homicides” – were hardly the first. In fact, the first veterans of George Bush’s wars returned to Fort Bragg, N.C., from Afghanistan in 2002.
On June 11, 2002, Sgt. First Class Rigoberto Nieves fatally shot his wife Teresa and then himself in their bedroom. On June 29, Sgt. William Wright strangled his wife Jennifer and buried her body in the woods. On July 9, Sgt. Ramon Griffin stabbed his estranged wife Marilyn 50 times or more and set her house on fire. On July 19, Sgt. First Class Brandon Floyd of Delta Force, the antiterrorism unit of the Special Forces, shot his wife Andrea and then killed himself. At least three of the murdered wives had been seeking separation or divorce.
When a New York Times reporter asked a master sergeant in the Special Forces to comment on these events, he responded: “S.F.’s [Special Forces members] don’t like to talk about emotional stuff. We are Type A people who just blow things like that off….”
The killings at Fort Bragg didn’t stop there. In February 2005, Army Special Forces trainee Richard Corcoran shot and wounded his estranged wife Michele and another soldier, then killed himself. He became the tenth fatality in a lengthening list of domestic violence deaths at Fort Bragg.
In February 2008, the Times reported finding “more than 150 cases of fatal domestic violence or [fatal] child abuse in the United States involving service members and new veterans” since the Afghan War began in October 2001. And it’s still going on.
The Pentagon: Conveniently Clueless
In April 2000, after three soldiers stationed at Fort Campbell, Ky., murdered their wives and CBS TV’s 60 Minutes broke a story on those deaths, the Pentagon established a task force on domestic violence. After three years of careful work, the task force reported its findings and recommendations to Congress on March 20, 2003, the day the United States invaded Iraq. Members of the House Armed Services Committee kept rushing from the hearing room, where testimony on the report was underway, to see how the brand new war was coming along.
What the task force discovered was that soldiers rarely faced any consequences for beating or raping their wives. (Girlfriends didn’t even count.) In fact, soldiers were regularly sheltered on military bases from civilian orders of protection and criminal arrest warrants. The military, in short, did a much better job of protecting servicemen from punishment than protecting their wives from harm.
Years later the military seems as much in denial as ever. It has, for instance, established “anger management” classes, long known to be useless when it comes to men who assault their wives. Batterers already manage their anger very well – and very selectively – to intimidate wives and girlfriends; rarely do they take it out on a senior officer or other figure of authority. It’s the punch line to an old joke: the angry man goes home to kick his dog, or more likely, his wife.
Anger may fire the shot, but misogyny determines the target. A sense of male superiority, and the habitual disrespect for women that goes with it, make many men feel entitled to control the lesser lives of women – and dogs. Even Hollywood gets the connection: in Paul Haggis’ stark film on the consequences of the Iraq War, In the Valley of Elah, a returned vet drowns the family dog in the bathtub – a rehearsal for drowning his wife.
The military does evaluate the mental health of soldiers. Three times it evaluated the mental health of Robert H. Marko (the Fort Carson infantryman who raped and murdered a girl), and each time declared him fit for combat, even though his record noted his belief that, on his 21st birthday, he would be transformed into the “Black Raptor,” half-man, half-dinosaur.
In February 2008, after the ninth homicide at Fort Carson, the Army launched an inquiry there too. The general in charge said investigators were “looking for a trend, something that happened through [the murderers'] life cycle that might have contributed to this.” A former captain and Army prosecutor at Fort Carson asked, “Where is this aggression coming from?… Was it something in Iraq?”
What Are We Fighting For?
Our women soldiers are a different story. The Department of Defense still contends that women serve only “in support of” U.S. operations, but in the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan “support” and “combat” often amount to the same thing. Between Sept. 11, 2001, and mid-2008, 193,400 women were deployed “in support of” U.S. combat operations. In Iraq alone, 97 were killed and 585 wounded.
Like their male counterparts, thousands of women soldiers return from Afghanistan and Iraq afflicted with PTSD. Their “invisible wounds,” however, are invariably made more complex by the conditions under which they serve. Although they train with other women, they are often deployed only with men. In the field they are routinely harassed and raped by their fellow soldiers and by officers who can destroy their careers if they protest.
On March 17, 2009, the Pentagon reported 2,923 cases of sexual assault in the past year in the U.S. military, including a 25 percent increase in assaults reported by women serving in Iraq and Afghanistan, assaults committed by men who serve under the same flag. What’s more, the Pentagon estimated that perhaps 80 percent of such rapes go unreported.
And then, when women come home as veterans, they, like their male counterparts, may be involved in domestic homicides. Unlike the men, however, they are usually not the killers, but the victims.
Shortly after Sgt. William Edwards and his wife, Sgt. Erin Edwards, returned to Fort Hood, Texas, in 2004 from separate missions in Iraq, he assaulted her. She moved off base, sent her two children to stay with her mother, brought charges against her husband, got an order of protection, and received assurances from her husband’s commanders that they would prevent him from leaving the base without an accompanying officer.
She even arranged for a transfer to a base in New York. However, on July 22, 2004, before she could leave the area, William Edwards skipped his anger management class, left the base by himself, drove to Erin Edwards’ house, and after a struggle, shot her in the head, then turned the gun on himself.
The police detective in charge of the investigation told reporters, “I believe that had he been confined to base and had that confinement been monitored, she would not be dead at his hands.” Base commanders excused themselves, saying they hadn’t known Erin Edwards was “afraid” of her husband. Even if true, since when is that a standard of military discipline? William Edwards had assaulted a fellow soldier. Normally, that would be some kind of crime – unless, of course, the victim was just a wife.
Back in North Carolina, near Fort Bragg and the nearby Marine base at Camp Lejeune, military men murdered four military women in nine months between December 2007 and September 2008. Marine Lance Cpl. Maria Lauterbach, eight months pregnant, went missing from Camp Lejeune in December 2007, not long before she was to testify that a fellow Marine, Cpl. Cesar Laurean, had raped her. In January, investigators found her burned body in a shallow grave in Laurean’s backyard. By then, he had fled to Mexico, his native country, and been apprehended there; but Mexico does not extradite citizens subject to capital punishment.
On June 21, the decomposing body of Spc. Megan Touma, seven months pregnant, was found in a motel room near Fort Bragg. In July, Sgt. Edgar Patino, a married man and the father of Touma’s child, was arrested and charged with her murder.
On July 10, Army 2nd Lt. Holly Wimunc, a nurse, failed to appear for work at Fort Bragg. Neighbors reported that her apartment was burning. Days later, her charred body was found near Camp Lejeune. She had been in the process of divorcing her estranged husband, Marine Cpl. John Wimunc, and had a restraining order against him. He and his friend Lance Cpl. Kyle Ryan Alden were charged with murder, arson, and felony conspiracy.
On Sept. 30, Army Sgt. Christina Smith was walking with her husband Sgt. Richard Smith in their Fayetteville neighborhood near Fort Bragg when an assailant plunged a knife into her neck. Richard Smith and Pfc. Mathew Kvapil, a hired hit man, were charged with murder and conspiracy.
Striking about these “intimate homicides” is their lack of intimacy. They tend to be planned and carried out with the kind of ruthless calculation that would go into any military plan of attack. Most were designed to eliminate an inconveniently pregnant lover and an unwelcome child, or to inflict the ultimate lesson on a woman about to make good her escape from a man’s control. In some of them, in good soldierly fashion, the man planning the killing was able to enlist the help of a buddy. On military Web sites you can read plenty of comments of comradely support for these homicidal men who so heroically “offed the bitches.”
Give Peace a Chance
The battered women’s movement once had a slogan: World peace begins at home. They thought peace could be learned by example in homes free of violence and then carried into the wider world. It was an idea first suggested in 1869 by the English political philosopher John Stuart Mill. He saw that “the subjection of women,” as he called it, engendered in the home the habits of tyranny and violence which afflicted England’s political life and corrupted its conduct abroad.
The idea seems almost quaint in competition with the brutal, dehumanizing effectiveness of two or three tours of duty in a pointless war and a little “mild” brain damage.
We had a respite for a while. For nearly a decade, starting in 1993, rates of domestic violence and wife murder went down by a few percentage points. Then in 2002, the vets started coming home.
No society that sends its men abroad to do violence can expect them to come home and be at peace. To let world peace begin at home, you have to stop making war. (Europe has largely done it.) Short of that, you have to take better care of your soldiers and the people they once knew how to love.
Alexandra Gonzalez-Waddington is an Augusta GA divorce lawyer & Georgia Military Divorce Lawyer Augusta Georgia domestic mediator. She is an Augusta military divorce lawyer, GA child custody attorney , and Augusta Georgia child support attorney. She offers mediation for divorce, child custody, and child support.
by Ann Jones
Wake up, America. The boys are coming home, and they’re not the boys who went away.
On New Year’s Day, the New York Times welcomed the advent of 2009 by reporting that, since returning from Iraq, nine members of the Fort Carson, Colo., Fourth Brigade Combat team had been charged with homicide. Five of the murders they were responsible for took place in 2008 when, in addition, “charges of domestic violence, rape, and sexual assault” at the base rose sharply. Some of the murder victims were chosen at random; four were fellow soldiers – all men. Three were wives or girlfriends.
This shouldn’t be a surprise. Men sent to Iraq or Afghanistan for two, three, or four tours of duty return to wives who find them “changed” and children they barely know. Tens of thousands return to inadequate, underfunded veterans’ services with appalling physical injuries, crippling post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), and suck-it-up sergeants who hold to the belief that no good soldier seeks help. That, by the way, is a mighty convenient belief for the Departments of Defense and Veterans Affairs, which have been notoriously slow to offer much of that help.
Recently, Republican Sen. John Cornyn from Texas, a state with 15 major military bases, noted that as many as one in five U.S. veterans is expected to suffer from at least one “invisible wound” of war, if not a combination of them, “including depression, post-traumatic stress disorder, and mild traumatic brain injury.” Left untreated, such wounds can become very visible: witness, for example, the recent wave of suicides that have swept through the military, at least 128 in 2008, and 24 in January 2009 alone.
To judge by past wars, a lot of returning veterans will do themselves a lot of damage drinking and drugging. Many will wind up in prison for drug use or criminal offenses that might have been minor if the offenders hadn’t been carrying guns they learned to rely on in the service. And a shocking number of those veterans will bring the violence of war home to their wives and children.
That’s no accident. The U.S. military is a macho club, proud of its long tradition of misogyny, and not about to give it up. One decorated veteran of the first Gulf War, who credited the army with teaching him to repress his emotions, described his basic training as “long, exhausting marches” and “sound-offs [that] revolved around killing and mutilating the enemy or violent sex with women.” (The two themes easily merge.) That veteran was Timothy McVeigh, the unrepentant Oklahoma City bomber, who must have known that blowing up a government office building during business hours was sure to kill a whole lot of women.
Even in the best of times, the incidence of violence against women is much higher in the military than among civilians. After war, it’s naturally worse – as with those combat team members at Fort Carson. In 2005, one of them, Pfc. Stephen Sherwood, returned from Iraq and fatally shot his wife, then himself. In September 2008, Pvt. John Needham, who received a medical discharge after a failed suicide attempt, beat his girlfriend to death. In October 2008, Spc. Robert H. Marko raped and murdered Judilianna Lawrence, a developmentally disabled teenager he met online.
These murders of wives and girlfriends – crimes the Bureau of Justice Statistics labels “intimate homicides” – were hardly the first. In fact, the first veterans of George Bush’s wars returned to Fort Bragg, N.C., from Afghanistan in 2002.
On June 11, 2002, Sgt. First Class Rigoberto Nieves fatally shot his wife Teresa and then himself in their bedroom. On June 29, Sgt. William Wright strangled his wife Jennifer and buried her body in the woods. On July 9, Sgt. Ramon Griffin stabbed his estranged wife Marilyn 50 times or more and set her house on fire. On July 19, Sgt. First Class Brandon Floyd of Delta Force, the antiterrorism unit of the Special Forces, shot his wife Andrea and then killed himself. At least three of the murdered wives had been seeking separation or divorce.
When a New York Times reporter asked a master sergeant in the Special Forces to comment on these events, he responded: “S.F.’s [Special Forces members] don’t like to talk about emotional stuff. We are Type A people who just blow things like that off….”
The killings at Fort Bragg didn’t stop there. In February 2005, Army Special Forces trainee Richard Corcoran shot and wounded his estranged wife Michele and another soldier, then killed himself. He became the tenth fatality in a lengthening list of domestic violence deaths at Fort Bragg.
In February 2008, the Times reported finding “more than 150 cases of fatal domestic violence or [fatal] child abuse in the United States involving service members and new veterans” since the Afghan War began in October 2001. And it’s still going on.
The Pentagon: Conveniently Clueless
In April 2000, after three soldiers stationed at Fort Campbell, Ky., murdered their wives and CBS TV’s 60 Minutes broke a story on those deaths, the Pentagon established a task force on domestic violence. After three years of careful work, the task force reported its findings and recommendations to Congress on March 20, 2003, the day the United States invaded Iraq. Members of the House Armed Services Committee kept rushing from the hearing room, where testimony on the report was underway, to see how the brand new war was coming along.
What the task force discovered was that soldiers rarely faced any consequences for beating or raping their wives. (Girlfriends didn’t even count.) In fact, soldiers were regularly sheltered on military bases from civilian orders of protection and criminal arrest warrants. The military, in short, did a much better job of protecting servicemen from punishment than protecting their wives from harm.
Years later the military seems as much in denial as ever. It has, for instance, established “anger management” classes, long known to be useless when it comes to men who assault their wives. Batterers already manage their anger very well – and very selectively – to intimidate wives and girlfriends; rarely do they take it out on a senior officer or other figure of authority. It’s the punch line to an old joke: the angry man goes home to kick his dog, or more likely, his wife.
Anger may fire the shot, but misogyny determines the target. A sense of male superiority, and the habitual disrespect for women that goes with it, make many men feel entitled to control the lesser lives of women – and dogs. Even Hollywood gets the connection: in Paul Haggis’ stark film on the consequences of the Iraq War, In the Valley of Elah, a returned vet drowns the family dog in the bathtub – a rehearsal for drowning his wife.
The military does evaluate the mental health of soldiers. Three times it evaluated the mental health of Robert H. Marko (the Fort Carson infantryman who raped and murdered a girl), and each time declared him fit for combat, even though his record noted his belief that, on his 21st birthday, he would be transformed into the “Black Raptor,” half-man, half-dinosaur.
In February 2008, after the ninth homicide at Fort Carson, the Army launched an inquiry there too. The general in charge said investigators were “looking for a trend, something that happened through [the murderers'] life cycle that might have contributed to this.” A former captain and Army prosecutor at Fort Carson asked, “Where is this aggression coming from?… Was it something in Iraq?”
What Are We Fighting For?
Our women soldiers are a different story. The Department of Defense still contends that women serve only “in support of” U.S. operations, but in the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan “support” and “combat” often amount to the same thing. Between Sept. 11, 2001, and mid-2008, 193,400 women were deployed “in support of” U.S. combat operations. In Iraq alone, 97 were killed and 585 wounded.
Like their male counterparts, thousands of women soldiers return from Afghanistan and Iraq afflicted with PTSD. Their “invisible wounds,” however, are invariably made more complex by the conditions under which they serve. Although they train with other women, they are often deployed only with men. In the field they are routinely harassed and raped by their fellow soldiers and by officers who can destroy their careers if they protest.
On March 17, 2009, the Pentagon reported 2,923 cases of sexual assault in the past year in the U.S. military, including a 25 percent increase in assaults reported by women serving in Iraq and Afghanistan, assaults committed by men who serve under the same flag. What’s more, the Pentagon estimated that perhaps 80 percent of such rapes go unreported.
And then, when women come home as veterans, they, like their male counterparts, may be involved in domestic homicides. Unlike the men, however, they are usually not the killers, but the victims.
Shortly after Sgt. William Edwards and his wife, Sgt. Erin Edwards, returned to Fort Hood, Texas, in 2004 from separate missions in Iraq, he assaulted her. She moved off base, sent her two children to stay with her mother, brought charges against her husband, got an order of protection, and received assurances from her husband’s commanders that they would prevent him from leaving the base without an accompanying officer.
She even arranged for a transfer to a base in New York. However, on July 22, 2004, before she could leave the area, William Edwards skipped his anger management class, left the base by himself, drove to Erin Edwards’ house, and after a struggle, shot her in the head, then turned the gun on himself.
The police detective in charge of the investigation told reporters, “I believe that had he been confined to base and had that confinement been monitored, she would not be dead at his hands.” Base commanders excused themselves, saying they hadn’t known Erin Edwards was “afraid” of her husband. Even if true, since when is that a standard of military discipline? William Edwards had assaulted a fellow soldier. Normally, that would be some kind of crime – unless, of course, the victim was just a wife.
Back in North Carolina, near Fort Bragg and the nearby Marine base at Camp Lejeune, military men murdered four military women in nine months between December 2007 and September 2008. Marine Lance Cpl. Maria Lauterbach, eight months pregnant, went missing from Camp Lejeune in December 2007, not long before she was to testify that a fellow Marine, Cpl. Cesar Laurean, had raped her. In January, investigators found her burned body in a shallow grave in Laurean’s backyard. By then, he had fled to Mexico, his native country, and been apprehended there; but Mexico does not extradite citizens subject to capital punishment.
On June 21, the decomposing body of Spc. Megan Touma, seven months pregnant, was found in a motel room near Fort Bragg. In July, Sgt. Edgar Patino, a married man and the father of Touma’s child, was arrested and charged with her murder.
On July 10, Army 2nd Lt. Holly Wimunc, a nurse, failed to appear for work at Fort Bragg. Neighbors reported that her apartment was burning. Days later, her charred body was found near Camp Lejeune. She had been in the process of divorcing her estranged husband, Marine Cpl. John Wimunc, and had a restraining order against him. He and his friend Lance Cpl. Kyle Ryan Alden were charged with murder, arson, and felony conspiracy.
On Sept. 30, Army Sgt. Christina Smith was walking with her husband Sgt. Richard Smith in their Fayetteville neighborhood near Fort Bragg when an assailant plunged a knife into her neck. Richard Smith and Pfc. Mathew Kvapil, a hired hit man, were charged with murder and conspiracy.
Striking about these “intimate homicides” is their lack of intimacy. They tend to be planned and carried out with the kind of ruthless calculation that would go into any military plan of attack. Most were designed to eliminate an inconveniently pregnant lover and an unwelcome child, or to inflict the ultimate lesson on a woman about to make good her escape from a man’s control. In some of them, in good soldierly fashion, the man planning the killing was able to enlist the help of a buddy. On military Web sites you can read plenty of comments of comradely support for these homicidal men who so heroically “offed the bitches.”
Give Peace a Chance
The battered women’s movement once had a slogan: World peace begins at home. They thought peace could be learned by example in homes free of violence and then carried into the wider world. It was an idea first suggested in 1869 by the English political philosopher John Stuart Mill. He saw that “the subjection of women,” as he called it, engendered in the home the habits of tyranny and violence which afflicted England’s political life and corrupted its conduct abroad.
The idea seems almost quaint in competition with the brutal, dehumanizing effectiveness of two or three tours of duty in a pointless war and a little “mild” brain damage.
We had a respite for a while. For nearly a decade, starting in 1993, rates of domestic violence and wife murder went down by a few percentage points. Then in 2002, the vets started coming home.
No society that sends its men abroad to do violence can expect them to come home and be at peace. To let world peace begin at home, you have to stop making war. (Europe has largely done it.) Short of that, you have to take better care of your soldiers and the people they once knew how to love.
Alexandra Gonzalez-Waddington is an Augusta GA divorce lawyer & Georgia Military Divorce Lawyer Augusta Georgia domestic mediator. She is an Augusta military divorce lawyer, GA child custody attorney , and Augusta Georgia child support attorney. She offers mediation for divorce, child custody, and child support.
Augusta Military Divorce Attorney - New York divorce laws cost us $100,000
Augusta Military Divorce Attorney - New York divorce laws cost us $100,000
BY Jose Martinez - DAILY NEWS STAFF WRITER
After more than a dozen years of marriage, John and Kelly agreed on this much: They both wanted out.
If only divorce in New York were that simple.
As the only state in the nation without no-fault divorce, New York does not allow a couple to cite "irreconcilable differences" as the reason for the split.
The law instead insists that one spouse pin blame on the other - and prove it in court - before a divorce can be granted.
The outdated system forced the suburban couple into a costly and extended pursuit of the divorce they both wanted in 2006.
"It's truly mind-boggling," said John, who works in finance. "It really prevents you from moving forward with your life."
When his wife contested his stated grounds for divorce, they could not reach a settlement and had to get ready for the next move, a full-blown trial.
Preparing for trial, calling multiple witnesses, paying lawyers and placing a value on his business cost the family of six close to $100,000, John said.
"This family spent an awful lot of money just getting to the point where it could be decided whether or not they could get a divorce," said John's lawyer, Michael Stutman. "So they took a 100-grand hit because of all this fiddling around."
After all that, Stutman said, a financial settlement was reached, "Just as the judge was about to say, 'Mr. Stutman, call your first witness.'"
Kelly's lawyer, Pamela Sloan, said the give-and-take of the fault law allowed her to negotiate a better settlement for her client. Still, she said, it drags out an already painful process.
"These are not warring people," said Sloan, a partner in the Manhattan firm of Sheresky Aronson Mayefsky & Sloan. "But this fault law just causes people to spend a lot of money and waste the court's time."
Living in a state that allows no-fault divorces, Stutman said, would have made the process faster and smoother, even if the couple still had to work out custody and property issues before getting a divorce.
"This is a pretty egregious example of the roadblocks that are put in the way of people on the path to restarting their lives," said Stutman, a partner in the Manhattan firm Mayerson Stutman Abramowitz Royer.
The separated spouses - who still have a few more issues to settle - have a "cordial" relationship, John said, and he praises his soon-to-be ex-wife as a "fabulous mother."
"You ought to see what divorce is like in other states," Stutman said. "It is so easy."
Alexandra Gonzalez-Waddington is an Augusta GA divorce lawyer & Georgia Military Divorce Lawyer Augusta Georgia domestic mediator. She is an Augusta military divorce lawyer, GA child custody attorney , and Augusta Georgia child support attorney. She offers mediation for divorce, child custody, and child support.
BY Jose Martinez - DAILY NEWS STAFF WRITER
After more than a dozen years of marriage, John and Kelly agreed on this much: They both wanted out.
If only divorce in New York were that simple.
As the only state in the nation without no-fault divorce, New York does not allow a couple to cite "irreconcilable differences" as the reason for the split.
The law instead insists that one spouse pin blame on the other - and prove it in court - before a divorce can be granted.
The outdated system forced the suburban couple into a costly and extended pursuit of the divorce they both wanted in 2006.
"It's truly mind-boggling," said John, who works in finance. "It really prevents you from moving forward with your life."
When his wife contested his stated grounds for divorce, they could not reach a settlement and had to get ready for the next move, a full-blown trial.
Preparing for trial, calling multiple witnesses, paying lawyers and placing a value on his business cost the family of six close to $100,000, John said.
"This family spent an awful lot of money just getting to the point where it could be decided whether or not they could get a divorce," said John's lawyer, Michael Stutman. "So they took a 100-grand hit because of all this fiddling around."
After all that, Stutman said, a financial settlement was reached, "Just as the judge was about to say, 'Mr. Stutman, call your first witness.'"
Kelly's lawyer, Pamela Sloan, said the give-and-take of the fault law allowed her to negotiate a better settlement for her client. Still, she said, it drags out an already painful process.
"These are not warring people," said Sloan, a partner in the Manhattan firm of Sheresky Aronson Mayefsky & Sloan. "But this fault law just causes people to spend a lot of money and waste the court's time."
Living in a state that allows no-fault divorces, Stutman said, would have made the process faster and smoother, even if the couple still had to work out custody and property issues before getting a divorce.
"This is a pretty egregious example of the roadblocks that are put in the way of people on the path to restarting their lives," said Stutman, a partner in the Manhattan firm Mayerson Stutman Abramowitz Royer.
The separated spouses - who still have a few more issues to settle - have a "cordial" relationship, John said, and he praises his soon-to-be ex-wife as a "fabulous mother."
"You ought to see what divorce is like in other states," Stutman said. "It is so easy."
Alexandra Gonzalez-Waddington is an Augusta GA divorce lawyer & Georgia Military Divorce Lawyer Augusta Georgia domestic mediator. She is an Augusta military divorce lawyer, GA child custody attorney , and Augusta Georgia child support attorney. She offers mediation for divorce, child custody, and child support.
Georgia Military Divorce Attorney - Corps V.I.P. Offers Soldiers Hope
Georgia Military Divorce Attorney - Corps V.I.P. Offers Soldiers Hope
BY ROBYN HEIRTZLER
CEDAR CITY - The need for treatment centers for soldiers is rising across the United States but Corps V.I.P. is working to fill that need starting in Southern Utah.
According to the Department of Defense, more than 1.6 million soldiers have been deployed to Iraq or Afghanistan since 2001. Approximately 30 percent of those veterans will experience Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and nearly as many will become alcoholics or binge drinkers. A high percentage will experience divorce and some will take their own lives.
These challenges are the result of the tragedies the soldiers have faced in combat, and they can last a lifetime.
Dr. Sid Young understands these issues well and has joined forces with Corps V.I.P. as director and consulting psychologist. Young has served since 1986 as a U.S. Army Chaplain assisting soldiers and families with reintegration. From November of 2003 to September of 2005 while in Germany, he greeted, briefed and counseled with more than 600,000 soldiers, earning him the title, "The chaplain."
Now Young will bring his skills to soldiers returning home through Corps V.I.P. Corps V.I.P is a non-profit organization founded in April of 2008 by Brandon Bateman and Tyson Olson. First pitched to Young by his friend, Brent Judd, Young knew he could not pass it up. It was the opportunity he'd been looking for to provide help to America's veterans.
Their mission statement sums it up best, stating, "The Corps V.I.P.'s mission is to restore an expression of gratitude to our military personnel for their selfless service to our country and to promote emotional well-being, positive growth relationships and healthy lifestyles for our American Veterans and their families."
"The transition from the combat environment to the community can be very difficult," says Young.
This transition impacts family relationships, divorce rates, depression, suicidal tendencies and anxiety disorders. In the past, these struggles were not addressed and many who returned home from wars, such as the Vietnam War, were left to face PTSD and other disorders largely on their own.
The effects of war on these soldiers have left them living with silent wounds that torment their memories. Young wants to help prevent that in today's returning troops as much as he's able.
"The Corps VIP recognizes the growing need for services to address the issues that arise from having a combat experience and are committed to addressing the emotional and spiritual needs of our soldiers and their families," states Corps V.I.P.
"We provide a wellness retreat package for service personnel and their families," says Young. "Each package offers a wellness retreat and provides a non-threatening environment to assess the mental, emotional and spiritual needs of the soldier and his or her family."
The retreats provide the skills needed to help with adjustments as soldiers return home. Skills are taught to enhance personal relationships, build trust and low self esteem, solve problems and improve communication through a six day all-inclusive retreat. These retreats are made possible through corporate and private sponsors to soldiers in southern Utah, but Corps V.I.P. plans to expand their reach.
Eventually Corps V.I.P. plans to have centers across the country to provide free support to service personnel everywhere. It's their way of saying "Thank you."
Alexandra Gonzalez-Waddington is an Augusta GA divorce lawyer & Georgia Military Divorce Lawyer Augusta Georgia domestic mediator. She is an Augusta military divorce lawyer, GA child custody attorney , and Augusta Georgia child support attorney. She offers mediation for divorce, child custody, and child support.
BY ROBYN HEIRTZLER
CEDAR CITY - The need for treatment centers for soldiers is rising across the United States but Corps V.I.P. is working to fill that need starting in Southern Utah.
According to the Department of Defense, more than 1.6 million soldiers have been deployed to Iraq or Afghanistan since 2001. Approximately 30 percent of those veterans will experience Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and nearly as many will become alcoholics or binge drinkers. A high percentage will experience divorce and some will take their own lives.
These challenges are the result of the tragedies the soldiers have faced in combat, and they can last a lifetime.
Dr. Sid Young understands these issues well and has joined forces with Corps V.I.P. as director and consulting psychologist. Young has served since 1986 as a U.S. Army Chaplain assisting soldiers and families with reintegration. From November of 2003 to September of 2005 while in Germany, he greeted, briefed and counseled with more than 600,000 soldiers, earning him the title, "The chaplain."
Now Young will bring his skills to soldiers returning home through Corps V.I.P. Corps V.I.P is a non-profit organization founded in April of 2008 by Brandon Bateman and Tyson Olson. First pitched to Young by his friend, Brent Judd, Young knew he could not pass it up. It was the opportunity he'd been looking for to provide help to America's veterans.
Their mission statement sums it up best, stating, "The Corps V.I.P.'s mission is to restore an expression of gratitude to our military personnel for their selfless service to our country and to promote emotional well-being, positive growth relationships and healthy lifestyles for our American Veterans and their families."
"The transition from the combat environment to the community can be very difficult," says Young.
This transition impacts family relationships, divorce rates, depression, suicidal tendencies and anxiety disorders. In the past, these struggles were not addressed and many who returned home from wars, such as the Vietnam War, were left to face PTSD and other disorders largely on their own.
The effects of war on these soldiers have left them living with silent wounds that torment their memories. Young wants to help prevent that in today's returning troops as much as he's able.
"The Corps VIP recognizes the growing need for services to address the issues that arise from having a combat experience and are committed to addressing the emotional and spiritual needs of our soldiers and their families," states Corps V.I.P.
"We provide a wellness retreat package for service personnel and their families," says Young. "Each package offers a wellness retreat and provides a non-threatening environment to assess the mental, emotional and spiritual needs of the soldier and his or her family."
The retreats provide the skills needed to help with adjustments as soldiers return home. Skills are taught to enhance personal relationships, build trust and low self esteem, solve problems and improve communication through a six day all-inclusive retreat. These retreats are made possible through corporate and private sponsors to soldiers in southern Utah, but Corps V.I.P. plans to expand their reach.
Eventually Corps V.I.P. plans to have centers across the country to provide free support to service personnel everywhere. It's their way of saying "Thank you."
Alexandra Gonzalez-Waddington is an Augusta GA divorce lawyer & Georgia Military Divorce Lawyer Augusta Georgia domestic mediator. She is an Augusta military divorce lawyer, GA child custody attorney , and Augusta Georgia child support attorney. She offers mediation for divorce, child custody, and child support.
Augusta Military Divorce Attorney - British soldiers victims of a mental conflict without end
Augusta Military Divorce Attorney - British soldiers victims of a mental conflict without end
by Alexi Mostrous and Ben Macintyre
It was nobody's fault, he said. Anthony Montgomery was a 21-year-old Royal Marine when he was ambushed by his own side on regular reconnaissance in the Falklands. Minutes later, he was trying to revive his friend who had been cut in half by British guns.
“It was confusing and awful,” he said. “We were both firing at each other. I saw Bob, Keith and Pete [surnames omitted] cut down. I tried to put Keith back together but I couldn't. He died in my arms. They were good brothers.” The incident was dealt with brusquely. “Back to business,” the commander said the next day.
Two years on Mr Montgomery was discharged with deafness and asthma brought on by stress, having been offered no treatment for trauma. Outside the Army, he quickly developed symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). His doctor said that they would go away. They didn't.
Mr Montgomery is only one casualty of a hidden war, a cruel conflict that takes place long after the physical battle, in ways that are seldom obvious and often ignored. Thousands of veterans who served in Iraq and Afghanistan are failing to benefit from government compensation for the mental scars inflicted by military service. Many feel abandoned by the society that sent them to war.
“The Government have been very slow to react,” Mr Montgomery said. “I've got a war pension but I had to fight for it. Every stage was a battle. As opposed to saying, ‘Well done, we'll look after you' they threw me on the scrapheap of society.”
He added: “I couldn't handle any emotion or show any and my marriage became very numb. It took me 13 years to seek help. Now I still have the symptoms but I can cope.”
Today, Mr Montgomery's health may never recover. His military career over, he cannot work, he suffers daily from nightmares and flashbacks so severe that he pictures his two sons fighting and dying alongside his comrades - even though they were born years after fighting ceased.
Although almost 4,000 military staff annually are found to have some form of mental disorder, in just over three years only 115 British personnel or veterans were compensated for the psychological injuries of war.
Under the Armed Forces Compensation Scheme any soldier or veteran who can show a service-related mental disorder lasting at least six weeks is eligible for a £3,000 payout. Any serviceman or woman whose mental injury lasts for five years or more is entitled, in principle, to £23,100. However, those who receive permanent mental scars from war - injuries which often cause lifelong disablement - can receive only up to £48,875. A soldier who loses a foot is paid the same, even though he may not even be discharged. By contrast, a soldier who is blinded receives £402,500.
As troops prepare to leave Iraq and up to 2,000 more troops are being earmarked for possible deployment to Afghanistan, psychiatrists and veterans' groups are warning of a “time bomb” of mental suffering. About 100,000 British armed service personnel have been deployed in Iraq, and the social impact of returning soldiers is also likely to be profound.
A study in 2007 showed that soldiers sent to Afghanistan are nine times more likely to suffer from PTSD, and those sent to Iraq six times more vulnerable than personnel who had not served in the war zones.
“The guerrilla nature of the Iraq and Afghanistan conflicts means that veterans will find it difficult to differentiate between a safe environment and a dangerous one, even back home,” Nikki Scheiner, a psychologist at the Traumatic Stress Service in St George's Hospital, South London, said. “There are no defined ‘war zones' in modern battle. You're always in danger.”
Depression and PTSD can lead to divorce, alcoholism and drug use. One in four personnel deployed overseas for more than 13 months had severe alcohol problems, research found.
Combat Stress, the charity set up to treat veterans with mental health problems, has reported a 53 per cent rise in GP referrals of veterans, with almost 1,200 cases last year. “On average veterans wait 14 years before seeking our help, and they often only do so after their lives have fallen apart,” Robert Marsh, director of fundraising at the charity, said. “If even 5 per cent of soldiers serving in Iraq and Afghanistan develop mental health issues that would equate to thousands of people. We won't cope.”
It is a fraught issue for the military, where the potential for psychological problems remains a taboo.“Most guys don't go and seek help,” said former Sergeant Charles Brindley, 58, who has PTSD. “I didn't and nothing's changed. They still see it as a sign of weakness. Unless your leg's fallen off you carry on.”
One former soldier, who did not want to be named, said: “In these theatres you saw a sustained and highly intense conflict. Young soldiers feel at constant threat, from suicide bombs, mortars, the whole thing. That sort of conflict has to have an impact on your mental state which the Government is not taking seriously. To award £5,000 for a disease that could cost you your job for life is outrageous.”
By comparison, prison officers regularly receive “six-figure payouts” for PTSD, the Prison Officers' Association said.
“I thought I was fine,” said former Lance Sergeant Alec Webster, 33, who served in Afghanistan with the Territorial Army in 2001. Mr Webster was discharged three years ago and got a job in security when he was attacked by a burglar. “After that the anxiety attacks started. It's getting worse. I'm jumpy and on edge. It's like a loaded gun.”
Mr Webster receives a war pension for a physical injury suffered in a Land Rover accident before 2005.
“I had to give up work a couple of years ago because I was so afraid I'd slap my supervisor,” he said. “The NHS gives you medication and says get lost. I feel that the Ministry of Defence don't care. They take the attitude that when you finish your service it's all over.”
Walter Busuttil, medical director of Combat Stress - which is part-funded by the MoD - has warned that the NHS cannot cope with military trauma. But with the demise of psychiatric centres for the Forces, the NHS is the only option. “I have heard cases of ex-servicemen put in NHS group therapy sessions,” he said. “When they have tried to talk about experiences in Afghanistan or Iraq, they have been told, ‘You can't talk about those things. You'll traumatise other patients'.”
Kevan Jones, Under Secretary of State for Defence, said that his department had “invested heavily”. He added: “We now have mental health units throughout the UK, psychiatric nurses in theatre, and a trauma mentoring scheme to encourage personnel to understand symptoms.”
Alexandra Gonzalez-Waddington is an Augusta GA divorce lawyer & Georgia Military Divorce Lawyer Augusta Georgia domestic mediator. She is an Augusta military divorce lawyer, GA child custody attorney , and Augusta Georgia child support attorney. She offers mediation for divorce, child custody, and child support.
by Alexi Mostrous and Ben Macintyre
It was nobody's fault, he said. Anthony Montgomery was a 21-year-old Royal Marine when he was ambushed by his own side on regular reconnaissance in the Falklands. Minutes later, he was trying to revive his friend who had been cut in half by British guns.
“It was confusing and awful,” he said. “We were both firing at each other. I saw Bob, Keith and Pete [surnames omitted] cut down. I tried to put Keith back together but I couldn't. He died in my arms. They were good brothers.” The incident was dealt with brusquely. “Back to business,” the commander said the next day.
Two years on Mr Montgomery was discharged with deafness and asthma brought on by stress, having been offered no treatment for trauma. Outside the Army, he quickly developed symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). His doctor said that they would go away. They didn't.
Mr Montgomery is only one casualty of a hidden war, a cruel conflict that takes place long after the physical battle, in ways that are seldom obvious and often ignored. Thousands of veterans who served in Iraq and Afghanistan are failing to benefit from government compensation for the mental scars inflicted by military service. Many feel abandoned by the society that sent them to war.
“The Government have been very slow to react,” Mr Montgomery said. “I've got a war pension but I had to fight for it. Every stage was a battle. As opposed to saying, ‘Well done, we'll look after you' they threw me on the scrapheap of society.”
He added: “I couldn't handle any emotion or show any and my marriage became very numb. It took me 13 years to seek help. Now I still have the symptoms but I can cope.”
Today, Mr Montgomery's health may never recover. His military career over, he cannot work, he suffers daily from nightmares and flashbacks so severe that he pictures his two sons fighting and dying alongside his comrades - even though they were born years after fighting ceased.
Although almost 4,000 military staff annually are found to have some form of mental disorder, in just over three years only 115 British personnel or veterans were compensated for the psychological injuries of war.
Under the Armed Forces Compensation Scheme any soldier or veteran who can show a service-related mental disorder lasting at least six weeks is eligible for a £3,000 payout. Any serviceman or woman whose mental injury lasts for five years or more is entitled, in principle, to £23,100. However, those who receive permanent mental scars from war - injuries which often cause lifelong disablement - can receive only up to £48,875. A soldier who loses a foot is paid the same, even though he may not even be discharged. By contrast, a soldier who is blinded receives £402,500.
As troops prepare to leave Iraq and up to 2,000 more troops are being earmarked for possible deployment to Afghanistan, psychiatrists and veterans' groups are warning of a “time bomb” of mental suffering. About 100,000 British armed service personnel have been deployed in Iraq, and the social impact of returning soldiers is also likely to be profound.
A study in 2007 showed that soldiers sent to Afghanistan are nine times more likely to suffer from PTSD, and those sent to Iraq six times more vulnerable than personnel who had not served in the war zones.
“The guerrilla nature of the Iraq and Afghanistan conflicts means that veterans will find it difficult to differentiate between a safe environment and a dangerous one, even back home,” Nikki Scheiner, a psychologist at the Traumatic Stress Service in St George's Hospital, South London, said. “There are no defined ‘war zones' in modern battle. You're always in danger.”
Depression and PTSD can lead to divorce, alcoholism and drug use. One in four personnel deployed overseas for more than 13 months had severe alcohol problems, research found.
Combat Stress, the charity set up to treat veterans with mental health problems, has reported a 53 per cent rise in GP referrals of veterans, with almost 1,200 cases last year. “On average veterans wait 14 years before seeking our help, and they often only do so after their lives have fallen apart,” Robert Marsh, director of fundraising at the charity, said. “If even 5 per cent of soldiers serving in Iraq and Afghanistan develop mental health issues that would equate to thousands of people. We won't cope.”
It is a fraught issue for the military, where the potential for psychological problems remains a taboo.“Most guys don't go and seek help,” said former Sergeant Charles Brindley, 58, who has PTSD. “I didn't and nothing's changed. They still see it as a sign of weakness. Unless your leg's fallen off you carry on.”
One former soldier, who did not want to be named, said: “In these theatres you saw a sustained and highly intense conflict. Young soldiers feel at constant threat, from suicide bombs, mortars, the whole thing. That sort of conflict has to have an impact on your mental state which the Government is not taking seriously. To award £5,000 for a disease that could cost you your job for life is outrageous.”
By comparison, prison officers regularly receive “six-figure payouts” for PTSD, the Prison Officers' Association said.
“I thought I was fine,” said former Lance Sergeant Alec Webster, 33, who served in Afghanistan with the Territorial Army in 2001. Mr Webster was discharged three years ago and got a job in security when he was attacked by a burglar. “After that the anxiety attacks started. It's getting worse. I'm jumpy and on edge. It's like a loaded gun.”
Mr Webster receives a war pension for a physical injury suffered in a Land Rover accident before 2005.
“I had to give up work a couple of years ago because I was so afraid I'd slap my supervisor,” he said. “The NHS gives you medication and says get lost. I feel that the Ministry of Defence don't care. They take the attitude that when you finish your service it's all over.”
Walter Busuttil, medical director of Combat Stress - which is part-funded by the MoD - has warned that the NHS cannot cope with military trauma. But with the demise of psychiatric centres for the Forces, the NHS is the only option. “I have heard cases of ex-servicemen put in NHS group therapy sessions,” he said. “When they have tried to talk about experiences in Afghanistan or Iraq, they have been told, ‘You can't talk about those things. You'll traumatise other patients'.”
Kevan Jones, Under Secretary of State for Defence, said that his department had “invested heavily”. He added: “We now have mental health units throughout the UK, psychiatric nurses in theatre, and a trauma mentoring scheme to encourage personnel to understand symptoms.”
Alexandra Gonzalez-Waddington is an Augusta GA divorce lawyer & Georgia Military Divorce Lawyer Augusta Georgia domestic mediator. She is an Augusta military divorce lawyer, GA child custody attorney , and Augusta Georgia child support attorney. She offers mediation for divorce, child custody, and child support.
Augusta Military Divorce Attorney - Oklahoma veterans fight for change in divorce law
Augusta Military Divorce Attorney - Oklahoma veterans fight for change in divorce law
BY JULIE BISBEE
Retired U.S. Navy flight engineer Frank Kurland is trying to get state courts to change how military retirement pay is viewed in divorce proceedings.
The 47-year-old Midwest City man and several retired service members are meeting with veterans groups across Oklahoma to discuss House Bill 1053.
Oklahoma is home to 338,000 retired service members, according to Veterans Affairs Department figures.
There are 21,000 active-duty members in the state, Defense Department figures show.
If this bill becomes law, Oklahoma will be the first state to require the courts to view military retirement pay differently.
When Kurland ended his 17-year marriage after retiring from the military, he was surprised to learn his ex-wife was entitled to a percentage of his military retirement pay, even if she remarried.
‘Serious change’
Under HB 1053, the payments would be viewed as alimony, not property, and alimony ends when the recipient remarries. The bill, filed by Rep. Gary Banz, R-Midwest City, passed the House and was approved by the Senate Judiciary committee last week.
"There is support to move this bill through the process,” said Sen. Patrick Anderson, R-Enid, who carried the measure in the Senate.
"But it’s a serious change and it needs to be looked at very carefully.”
Last session, Banz was successful in getting through language that would require judges in divorce proceedings to consider how long a spouse was married to a retired military member and what the service member’s pay grade was at the time of the marriage before awarding a percentage of retirement pay.
That change was signed into law by Gov. Brad Henry and takes effect July 1.
Before this provision was put into place, a spouse that had been married to an enlisted person for a short time early in a service member’s career would be entitled to a portion of the retirement pay.
Different status seen
The bill’s opponents say it makes major changes to state divorce laws and gives special preference to veterans. They also say the plan could add to Oklahoma’s high divorce rate.
Sen. Charlie Laster, D-Shawnee, a family law attorney, voted against the legislation when it was heard in committee.
"This is a huge change in Oklahoma laws,” Laster said. "This would give military members a distinct different status in divorce law. I’m not sure that’s good for public policy.”
Supporters of the change argue that military retirement pay comes with requirements and stipulations that a traditional pension doesn’t carry.
"We’re just trying to even the playing field,” Kurland said. "We don’t want to go after the former spouses, but we want to give the Oklahoma courts something to consider and at least look at.”
Alexandra Gonzalez-Waddington is an Augusta GA divorce lawyer & Georgia Military Divorce Lawyer Augusta Georgia domestic mediator. She is an Augusta military divorce lawyer, GA child custody attorney , and Augusta Georgia child support attorney. She offers mediation for divorce, child custody, and child support.
BY JULIE BISBEE
Retired U.S. Navy flight engineer Frank Kurland is trying to get state courts to change how military retirement pay is viewed in divorce proceedings.
The 47-year-old Midwest City man and several retired service members are meeting with veterans groups across Oklahoma to discuss House Bill 1053.
Oklahoma is home to 338,000 retired service members, according to Veterans Affairs Department figures.
There are 21,000 active-duty members in the state, Defense Department figures show.
If this bill becomes law, Oklahoma will be the first state to require the courts to view military retirement pay differently.
When Kurland ended his 17-year marriage after retiring from the military, he was surprised to learn his ex-wife was entitled to a percentage of his military retirement pay, even if she remarried.
‘Serious change’
Under HB 1053, the payments would be viewed as alimony, not property, and alimony ends when the recipient remarries. The bill, filed by Rep. Gary Banz, R-Midwest City, passed the House and was approved by the Senate Judiciary committee last week.
"There is support to move this bill through the process,” said Sen. Patrick Anderson, R-Enid, who carried the measure in the Senate.
"But it’s a serious change and it needs to be looked at very carefully.”
Last session, Banz was successful in getting through language that would require judges in divorce proceedings to consider how long a spouse was married to a retired military member and what the service member’s pay grade was at the time of the marriage before awarding a percentage of retirement pay.
That change was signed into law by Gov. Brad Henry and takes effect July 1.
Before this provision was put into place, a spouse that had been married to an enlisted person for a short time early in a service member’s career would be entitled to a portion of the retirement pay.
Different status seen
The bill’s opponents say it makes major changes to state divorce laws and gives special preference to veterans. They also say the plan could add to Oklahoma’s high divorce rate.
Sen. Charlie Laster, D-Shawnee, a family law attorney, voted against the legislation when it was heard in committee.
"This is a huge change in Oklahoma laws,” Laster said. "This would give military members a distinct different status in divorce law. I’m not sure that’s good for public policy.”
Supporters of the change argue that military retirement pay comes with requirements and stipulations that a traditional pension doesn’t carry.
"We’re just trying to even the playing field,” Kurland said. "We don’t want to go after the former spouses, but we want to give the Oklahoma courts something to consider and at least look at.”
Alexandra Gonzalez-Waddington is an Augusta GA divorce lawyer & Georgia Military Divorce Lawyer Augusta Georgia domestic mediator. She is an Augusta military divorce lawyer, GA child custody attorney , and Augusta Georgia child support attorney. She offers mediation for divorce, child custody, and child support.
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